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Security and How to Deal With Them Without Shooting Them


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Assuming you're an antagonist, you deal with security by killing them. End of story. Don't need to write novels on how to remove pesky security officers from getting in the way of your lofty goals. X out. Game over. There's nothing else for you to read if you want a guide on how to efficiently and brutally kill off security as an antagonist. I know how, but as a security main, I ain't gonna tell you.


Assuming you're not an antagonist, there is a right way and a wrong way to deal with security. Some methods would be considered the right way, others are the wrong way. Here's how to deal with them the right way and not get more than you bargained for, this guide is majorly inspired from another guide on how to deal with IRL law enforcement.


Part 1. Understanding the goals of security.


The first step in dealing with security is having a little empathy. It sounds like bullshit but it really isn't. Understanding security and relating with their position can allow you to skate on the thin ice that you do and still get away with it in the end. The goal of security is to enforce the regulations of the station. They probably don't like enforcing the more asinine ones anymore than you like them enforcing them either. But they aren't doing their job if they don't try to engage you and resolve the issue.


A.) The security officer's first concern is their own safety. Yours comes second.


You're not convincing anyone that a security officer's first concern should be anyone other than themselves. They are useless to you and the station when they are dead. Ergo, they are better for you when they are alive.

Everything a security officer does is bound to skirt past or across the boundaries of putting themselves in danger, because it is their job. Think of it this way, they're in the thick of it so that your geek science character doesn't have to be.

Surprised when you get your ass royally kicked if you move wrong or get batonned down without any prior escalation? You likely got batonned down because they don't want to risk you retaliating and kicking their ass. Not saying they're totally justified in that use of force but that thought process still exists, and there's nothing you can do about it when it happens aside from avoiding this situation altogether.

You may be within the understanding that your character is a nice, non-threatening one that would never hurt a fly, but the player on the other end of the screen doesn't know that, and their character probably doesn't know that either. They are most likely thinking about how the situation can go wrong and how to retaliate if it does. In most given cases, the security character has zero real idea what they're up against, and their hope is that it doesn't go wrong, but they are likely already planning out a contingency in advance if/when things go wrong. Don't give them a reason to execute the contingency if you can help it.

The first minute of interaction with a security officer is incredibly crucial because in that first minute, they're already analyzing you for threat potential. Don't act like, look like, or be a threat. Just be chill and don't act confrontational. Everything you should be doing on initial contact with an officer is to display the fact that you are not a threat.


B.) Yes, most security officers are power-tripping.


I'm not sugar-coating this. The average pubbie probably plays security to have power in the game. It is immediate access to authority and an ability to do as they like. This doesn't make them bad people or even bad players, it's just how it is. For every one loser that has no friends and seems like they compensate for something, there are ten others that actually enjoy the interaction and the experience in keeping other characters in the round and safe, and also enjoy the amount of characters they deal with. They're playing security for the right reasons, even. But all security officers are motivated by some extent to exercise power over others by some extent. There is quite literally no exception to this.


However, this means by understanding that fact, that it can be exploited in a way that benefits your own safety. In no circumstances should you challenge the power and authority of a security officer. They will prove you wrong on both counts. You can't "get lucky" because their fellow security friends will kick your ass anyway. Threatening their power dynamic also threatens their identity. Threatening the identity of a security officer on a power trip spells instant doom for you. Don't do this, because they won't hesitate to validate themselves and make you look like an idiot in the end.


You can exploit power trippers to your advantage. Instead of fighting the power trip, submit to it. Don't give them the trouble, if they really are power-tripping, they're basically asking you to give them a reason to kick your ass. Apologize for whatever they're accusing you of and promise you won't do it again, and the odds are they'll soften your sentence or let you go. Why? Because letting you get off scot free makes them still feel just as powerful as if they were to arrest you. But with none of the procedural nonsense involved. Forgiveness is the ultimate display of power, and if they're a showboat about it, they will indeed showboat they're capable of doing it.


C.) Security officers categorize all people they meet into three groups: Crew, Criminals, Other Security.


In this order, the crew are the people the officers protect, the criminals are the ones that security slam into a brig cell, and other security are their fellow teammates.


Why does it matter? Because if you did something stupid and you realize that it was stupid, your immediate goal is to convince the officer accosting you that what you did was a mistake and not a deliberate criminal action. Convince them you're part of the crew and their interests, and not a criminal with self-absorbed interests. Officers are very lenient with people they think are upstanding crewmembers. They are very harsh on people they think are petty criminals or worse. If an officer is a dick to you, it's because they think you're a criminal. And to them, the criminals are the bad guys. Up to a certain point, what you do matters significantly less than what the would-be arresting officer thinks of you.


You can be absolutely sure all these traits apply to security officers. There's another way to lump officers into, and they're what are called 'personality types.' These are the three most common you'll run into:


I. - The Blue Collar Pro.


This is most security officers. These are people who value discipline, law and order, and are not happy doing things that an IAA would do. They have zero patience for nuance and are very motivated to do their job and do that job well. They seek adrenaline and a sense of purpose for what they do. All they want, however, is for people to treat them with basic respect and common decency. Among all the security types that exist, the BCP are a lot like other characters. They have unique flaws like the rest of us but are trying their best to fit into the environment we all exist in.


These are security fellows you don't want to fuck with because you have the best chance to get off scot free from your mistakes with these people. They'll let you off with a warning if you don't jerk them around, play it cool and act like an adult around them. The problem is that they often deal with idiots that just don't get it and think these people are the bad guys too. They aren't, but they have to respond to it in a way that validates the idiot's beliefs or else they aren't doing the job right.


Because these are people with a degree of normalcy and self-validation, a healthy ego and such, it's heavily advised to be respectful to these people, because any degree of offense to them can cause them to enter a threat stance and treat you as the risk you're posturing yourself as. Don't do this.


Basic Blue Collar Pro Personality Profile:

-Believes in law and order

-Probably has military background in lore, or they're very experienced in law enforcement.

-Average or slightly above average intelligence.

-Prefers dominance/submission displays in human interactions. Both for safety reasons and personal reasons, they like to feel in charge

-Believes at some level he has moral authority and is doing the right thing


General Rules on How to Deal with Basic Blue Collar Pro:

-Be calm and respectful

-Show you aren’t a threat

-Tell the truth

-Don’t bullshit them


II. Washout College Loser


These are security characters (and players, even!) to be extremely cautious with. These are the small, petty, insecure and self-righteous talking penises on powertrips asking for you to give them a reason to kick your ass. If the BCPs are the good guys, the Washout College Loser is the villain of this story. All of us have encountered the Washout College Loser and they are not pretty to behold in-game.


These characters exist in security because of their overall background with failing on the social level. They are there to show all the 'entitled pricks' that they see on the station just simply exist to be proven wrong and taken down a notch. They see security as their chance to level the playing field and imbalance the existing power dynamics in throwing their own weight around to show they can be capable of being dominant, too. They operate with a massive chip on their shoulder on a round-to-round basis. They will take every opportunity to exercise it on you if it makes them feel better in doing it, or if they already profiled you as the individual they are designed to hate. They will profile your character based on their looks, at first-glance mannerisms, their role on the station, your alleged transgression, et cetera. They probably already have you pegged as the bad guy or the 'criminal' by step one.


These people do NOT take kindly to being undermined in the slightest. They have very fragile egos, and while they're below average intelligence for security officers, they know how to make you look and feel dumb. They'll beat you with experience.


Washout College Loser Personality Profile:

-Uses law and order to justify his envy and rage

-Rarely ex-military, expresses 'patriotism' as rabid hate towards any marginalized group of any sort. The most impotent of the bunch.

-Below average intelligence (for security officers, but still not stupid enough to fool easily).

-Keenly aware of dominance/submission displays in interactions, but exclusively for personal reasons


General Rules on How to Deal with Washout College Loser:

-Sucking up is not a bad thing for these types, seeing as how ignoring them or otherwise offending them lands you on their shit-list.

-Never do anything that they will perceive as a threat to their power or status as security, they overreact to any perceived resistance

-If you REALLY know the regs, then you can engage them in procedural discussions. Otherwise, avoid subject entirely, they don't like being shown up at all.

-Understand that most often they aren’t letting you out of what they caught you for, so just swallow it and don’t make it worse by giving them an excuse to increase the charges.


III. Old Guard


The Old Guard understand that while the rules exist to be broken, 'accidentally' breaking some of the obvious ones is still stupid even for a Washout College Loser and worthy of drawing their attention. The Old Guard have adjusted to the environment of dealing with various situations as security for long enough to understand that moral precepts are ultimately irrelevant to them and that upholding of the general safety within reason, is the only thing that matters to them. They come into the profession already understanding what regulations are enforced by black letter law and what others are simply guidelines rather than actual rules in terms of how they're enforced. These are even fewer in number than either the BCP or the WCLs individually. They have a very jaded view of the security department, criminals, and the crew relationships that intertwine together, even going so far as to say there's often little difference between the groups at times. Because of this, however, they can either be a better ally on your side than a BCP or a worse enemy than a WCL if you manage to sway them one way or another with your mannerisms. Establishing trust with an Old Guard security member is very important to keep yourself on their good side. Depending on their mood and your behavior they can let you get away with anything short of a high crime or book you with any assortment of regulations in the book and find every justification to ruin your round.


It's what happens when you get someone that has played security long enough to know how to flex potential power to the overall greater good or for their own personal benefit. Security like this is too easy to conflate with BCPs if they're in a good mood or with WCLs if they're in a pissed mood. The difference to note is their overall intelligence and self-awareness, but outside of that they're much more laid back than BCPs or WCLs. Short of being made to care due to how you've behaved, their jaded nature can make them unwilling to enforce regulations at times, especially if they don't feel up to stressing over idiots that test their patience.


If things are going well, you can easily identify them from BCPs, however it's important to note that if you screwed up in some measure in interactions, you may get the book thrown harder than what the WCL is capable of intelligently doing.


Old Guard Personality Profile:

-Understand that law and order are very fluid concepts

-Has jaded view of the criminal process. Gets the concept of 'skeletons in the closet' very easily.

-Above average to significantly high intelligence. Tend to be smartest of all security types.

-Also the laziest of security, is the most likely to let you off if you give them a reason or they think you are a good person. They know how best to avoid the most work, it's brutal efficiency through experience.


General Rules on How to Deal with the Old Guard:

-Befriend them as much as possible

-Subtly display that you “get it”

-Talk to them like normal people, but don’t get too familiar or forget that they are security, or else they'll catch on real quick that you're a real charmer.


This is it for today's lesson, which was largely detailing the internal psychology involved. I'll post another page later today or tomorrow on how to treat various situations.

Edited by Guest
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I'm now going to explain precisely how this information is supposed to apply to you.


Part 2. Dealing With Specific Situations


Everything you do from here on when dealing with security is to prioritize dealing with them as minimally as possible. Exposing yourself to security often is absolutely not a good thing in 90% of cases. Knowing how to limit your exposure to security's watchful eye(s) should be your top priority.


Debating the pros and cons of the justice system as applied to SS13 is inherently pointless due to how time-consuming it is to go over all of the factors involved. Regardless, it's a discussion for a different place. The only thing that matters is that you recognize the justice system as applied by the security force for what it is and not what you think it should be. Having high expectations leads you only down the road of disappointment.


Regulations are great on paper in what they're supposed to do, but in practice they are neither fair nor just. Good people tend to get fucked and the bad guys can often get away with it. Don't let the appearance of the head of security having an implant fool you. The mortal factor allows them to make mistakes in judgement due to not having the full context of a situation and potentially not even realizing it, thus making them make a stupid decision that they otherwise think is in the best interests of the company. In which case, they ICly cannot be wrong. They can be easy to exploit compared to less company-bound individuals who have the merit of being able to think for themselves. Once you've dealt with how the system works, you will recognize that anything can happen, and that there are also no guarantees in the same vein of understanding the whole picture. It's a huge blur, everyone's moral compass is always spinning, all the time. Don't just apply to you, it applies to security, too. They have more than enough capacity to be the bad guy in a situation and they likely won't even know it till it's too late.


Not telling you not to have fun or not to be crazy. Not telling you that you can't break regulations. But in spite of this, the lesson I'll lay out is that you definitely don't want the lumbering machinations of security to decide your fate for you. Even in the best cases, it's an awful experience to deal with.


Two Concepts You Need to Get to Really 'Get It'


1. On the scene, security has a potent amount of operational authority. On the scene, security is your God. They are Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds. They can do anything they like, want, or wish, and they absolutely know it. They can arrest you for anything, jack you around for however the round lasts, and ruin your entire day in numerous methods.


This doesn't mean they can do as they like unpunished, but it does mean that it's difficult to regulate them "in the heat of the moment." And it shouldn't be your objective to do that. Your objective is to avoid getting your ass handed to you unfairly.


People have this very foolish notion that security is restricted through some rigid legal guidelines that they have to follow. This is no longer true ever since SOP was cast into the void and merely accepted as "guidelines to follow, but not actual rules" a la The Pirates Code. Security has an incredible amount of discretion to exercise at a crime scene or when responding to a situation. Short of killing/robbing/maiming/abusing you without an escalated reason, they may do as they like on the scene. They can arrest you if they so like. To the most nasty-mannered security officer, a warrant is a social construct that they don't care about. Warrants only matter as much as there's a head of staff to enforce them.


If you didn't do anything serious, and you make an avid effort in respecting the security member and deferred to their authority, they hold the ability to give you the benefit of the doubt and just as easily let you go, especially if they have to do less work at the end of the day in dealing with you.


Conversely, being a dick to an officer, or if they're hellbent on taking you in due to their 'compensation issues' as previously mentioned, then there's absolutely nothing you can do about it even if they are wrong. If you even try to do something about it, you're going to see your character seriously bruised or muzzled on your embarassing route to the brig.


Thankfully if they're screwing with you and wasting their time in addition to yours because of a sick power trip they're on, then more than likely they're going to have choice words with their ranking head of staff. Either way, you're spending time in the brig and possibly getting your ass kicked. It's probably for the best that you're in a cell for a bit rather than in surgery or the morgue because you insisted on resisting.


Take this as gospel: if provoked, a security officer will fuck you up if they get the chance to do so. They'll do it legally and with pleasure, and it'll be awful even if it gets resolved in your favor in the end. Do not count on anything other than avoiding the worst case scenario in the first place.


2. Officers don't judge cases for s-h-i-t. They just decide if you're deserving of being arrested. Officers only initiate the criminal process via an arrest. They don't hold that much power when it comes to making the final judgement beyond what the final arrest of you was. An officer's power drops dramatically after he arrests you, and they stop becoming 'God' right then and there. There's little else they can do besides provide testimony and excuses. After being arrested is when you become powerful again. You have the ability to provide testimony and explain a situation after you've been detained. They go from 'major shot-caller' to 'small cog' within a skip and a hop.


The Four Basic Scenarios As Follows.


1. "I am totally innocent."

This may sound incredibly unintuitive to the oddball, ideological libertarian that happens to play on this server and also make a routine out of job-blocking security any chance they get, but if you have nothing to hide, then do not hide anything. Do not be deceptive. Don't leave out critical details. Chances are, you aren't good at it, and I'm not making a guide to teach any of you how to lie, ever. If you leave out a detail that you 'neglected to mention', the officer dealing with you either as a suspect or a witness, will have you pegged for a very shitty liar from the get-go, and your credibility flushes itself down the toilet. Now the officer thinks you're one of the bad guys. Good job.


If you are innocent, act the part. It's fine to be a little nervous or jittery especially if that's a character attribute. Just don't expect anything good to come of your character 'forgetting to mention' something that would've been extremely helpful for the security officer and would've gotten your butt out of dodge. Let it all out, even as absurd as the story sounds. Better to be honest and sound a little ridiculous than to sound like you're not willing to tell the insane-but-still-the-truth.


Don't act like you can tell a plausible story filled with excuses and get away with it. Security expects to be lied to somewhere along the way and they'll look into a case a bit deeper if two sides of the story don't add up. They're pretty well trained to detect lies.


First thing that good investigative security will do is deliberately attempt to calm you down, slow everybody's heart-rates down some beats. They'll be patient, and they'll listen closely. After they've heard your testimony, they'll ask questions along the lines of 'I repeat myself in what I'm asking you but I do so from different angles'. The reason being for their repetitiveness? They're waiting for you to change your story. "I don't know" is a fine answer if you're not sure on something. Don't act sure on something that you know you're not sure on. Security isn't trying to prove whether you're telling the truth, they're trying to judge if you're lying.


Unless you think you're good at lying, you will get tripped up, you'll get caught in an inaccuracy and they'll oust you as a liar and think you have "criminal" written all over you. Then you're fucked, even if you haven't done anything wrong.


Tell the truth. Contrast with trying to be good at lying or failing to get your story straight: it is 99.9% risk-free.


2. "I'm guilty of something small and stupid, and I got caught doing it."


Least you're honest. Ergo, you should be honest. Admit to the fault and, if you really need to, apologize profusely. No, really. It really is a submission thing and it goes on for miles. Being able to manipulate a power dynamic in your favor is a major reason why physically weak people have survived in society for so long. They suck up to the powerful and don't get the worst thrown at them. It's much of the same way when it comes to the law enforcer/civilian dichotomy. It's an ageless social construct but it's certainly saved lives.


Admitting to your faults and apologizing for it tells the officer that you're a civilian who made a MISTAKE, not a criminal who is REPEATING BAD BEHAVIOR. Security works on a basic premise of defining people, remember. There's Citizens (You), Criminals (Antagonistic Bad Guys) and Security (themselves, the team unit meant to protect You and kick the ass of Bad Guys). Don't act like the criminal who takes no shits or responsibility. Be the Citizen that takes responsibility and accepts the consequences, and they'll go light.


3. You’re guilty, you get caught, and it’s a big deal:


Yeah, you're fucked. You are not getting out of this one. Just take what charge you got and deal with it. Don't put up a fight with an Orange-level or Red-level charge. The officer won't hesitate to beat you senseless for a serious crime you committed. It's not worth it, don't make things worse. If you commit a serious crime, or cause a serious accident by your own neglectfulness, don't try to argue someone's death away. You're the idiot, the incident is your fault, you could've done things to prevent it from happening, but you didn't and it still happened anyway. Accept these facts and roll with the punches, don't swing back expecting not to get hit again.


The arresting officer will ask you if you were paying attention. They'll ask you if you knew what was going on. They'll ask you every question phrased in a way trying to disrupt your thinking process and catch you in an inconsistent testimony trap. If they get you to admit it was willful, you're fucked because you couldn't keep your mouth from saying stupid shit. They get you to admit you weren't paying attention, you'll get slapped with a charge befitting of an incompetent doing the same thing, and they'll likely rag you for it. Accept it. Don't escalate and make it worse. Accept that you did wrong.


Learn how to 'shut up.' I won't mince words and be nice about this, when in doubt, don't say anything and shut up. There are situations where your conscience is outright telling you, "I should stop talking," because that little voice in your head is likely the one who is really fearing any potential consequences that could escalate if you say something especially dumb accompanying what you did.


Only some security officers are especially stupid. Others are quite good at understanding the application of regulations and how to get you to talk in a way that produces the evidence and testimony they need to put you away. They're not required to tell you the truth, either. They can and are allowed to lie to you if it means they can get a confession out of you, incriminate you for more based on what you said, or get you to tell multiple versions of a single story to show how inconsistent and untrustworthy you are. Shitcurity and goodcurity both use the same methods but do it for different reasons. Don't get pegged as a liar by either, you'll get dunked on super hard by either party, whatever their reasons.


If you must say something, say it in processing. Not at the scene.


4. They're deliberately trying to jack you up, and you know it


This scenario is less "You're fucked" and morein "You're fucked if you display that you think you're fucked."


This is a worst case scenario over being caught for a huge crime by a legitimately decent officer. If you're getting unjustly jacked up, don't call the washout on their shit. Seriously, don't. He may be a washout but you can be shot, beaten or tased for trying to fuck with an officer back. Physically speaking, that's kinda worse off than how they are after you offended their fragile ego. Don't argue it if they're telling you to do something that's BS. Just do it, relax, and follow along as they say carefully. It's a far harder battle to fight to try and defend "your rights" against someone who doesn't care about your rights, they're playing security just to fuck with people like you. You're sized up as an easy target, it's the only reason they're punking on you. Don't paint in bright red and white on your forehead for them. You'll more than likely lose the fight against the officer with the stun gear and the cuffs.

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