[Denied] - Vaurca Application, Mr.Fagetti

[Mr.Fagetti]

BYOND Key: Mr.Fagetti

Character Names: Tr'Akr, or Tracker

Species you are applying to play: Vaurca

What color do you plan on making your first alien character (Dionaea & IPCs exempt): Default grey, like the in-game picture.

Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: Yes.

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Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question

Why do you wish to play this specific race:

I feel that my character is well suited for this role, as he would work as a engineer or miner and battle the onslaught of racism that he would frequently deal with and suspicion he would be put under as his past would otherwise mention. I've written Tr'Akr as a more or less free-willed character and otherwise would like to see how people would react to seeing a rather unusual alien on their station. Taking into consideration that I've written a before-hand backstory and am still thinking of ways to branch this character to have more emotional and regular sight on the Exodus/Aurora station.

Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human:

The Vaurca are a race of insectoid that work on the station, I feel that they would experience racism just the same as a Vox or Skrell and deal with the discrimination of being this race. The Vaurca are know for being part of two large hives and have a complex caste system to this day. I hope that Tr'Akr's hive (being the K'lax hive) and caste (which is rather undetermined as of his past) will play a role in his relationships with other personnel and that he will face the struggles of being a bugman in a apeman's galaxy.

 

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Character Name: Tr'Akr

Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs

Tr'Akr was stolen during his egg-stage in development by a group of pirates working for a unknown Syndicate group. When he hatched he was raised and hired by the Syndicate group to do relatively unknown sabotage and kidnapping. During one of his operations, he was flanked and he and the group were taken and killed, except for Tr'Akr.

Nanotrasen representative realized that Tr'Akr was unnamed and uneducated, only knowing Gutter and what little Galactic Common he could chatter. Tr'Akr (which was later named Tracker by his educators) was taught basic language and his native language and was then hired on by Nanotrasen for his abilities in mechanical engineering and machine operation. Although Tr'Akr was young when he was caught, Nanotrasen still holds suspicions over him mixed with their natural racism.

What do you like about this character?

His backstory, and his charater are one of the things I like about Tr'Akr as he deals with his problems through a drab personality, he also works to maintain his past and actively trys to learn about Humans and their history.

How would you rate your role-playing ability?

I'd say I'm not exactly a master of roleplay, but I do love developing characters and I hope I can see another perspective for my roleplay.

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Notes: I'd like to thank you for taking you time in reading all of this, I can't say I'm great at writing but I hope I met all your criteria!

[Jboy2000000]

Im gonna be blunt, I don't see this being accepted for a number of reasons.

For one, this is your first post on the forums, and the only character on your character list is the one you're applying for, and both of those are generally frowned up by the community when you're making an application. People expect to see you around a bit, know you before to have anything to say about you.

Secondly, the backstory is underwhelming, and I, myself, don't think it really stands up to requirements of a whitelist, which means you're supposed to display that you know what the race's lore is, and that you will be interesting with the characters you create with it, and it's just barely two paragraphs.

And lastly, you don't seem to actually have a good grasp on our lore either. It'd be virtually impossible to steal a Vaurca egg, if they even do lay eggs, and you say in your app that you expect to be discriminated against like Vox and Skrell, but that isn't close to right. For starters, Skrell aren't discriminated against, they're on par with humans more or less, and Vox are hardly a thing in our lore, they're around, but they don't work on space station, they're just dirty space nomads that only bumble in NT space on a rare occasion.

[spacevoidagent]

The backstory, name, and color are all lacking in depth or correctness. If you read about the Vaurca on the wiki you would see the guidelines for color and naming.

First, your name indicates nothing about their type (Worker, Soldier, Breeder) , if they are Bound or Unbound, and what hive they hail from (Zo'ra or K'lax; antag Vaurca can be from Lii'dra). This is a must for Vaurca so that they can be easily identified by crew and other Vaurca.

Secondly, your characters backstory just seems like a setup for your Vaurca to be a criminal and 'battle' racism on station. Most Vaurca players, including myself, enjoy the racism as it is something that is Canon and well known to be acceptable and engaging role play. I highly doubt the chance of your egg being stolen as they would be heavily guarded, and even if it did, when you hatched you would just be a husk of a Vaurca. There would be no Type C breeder to determine your role and feed you information necessary for your survival in space, nonetheless Human Space. You would lack the augmentation needed to speak Basic, let alone Gutter. To put it bluntly, your backstory just makes you look like you want to have a very special and unique Vaurca.

Third, you can't just be gray. You have to choose a color corresponding to your type, hive, and bound/unbound status.

I know my response may seem rude but that is not my intention. I just wanted to give clear, constructive criticism. If you want to truly play a Vaurca, I recommend you make a character that is believable and more common rather then someone who was a syndicate who was the only survivor of a attack and was spared and hired by NanoTrasen.

[Mr.Fagetti]

Alright, I think I'll read up more until I apply another application. Thanks.