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Chemistry (Better!)


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Hello! Welcome to my guide of chemistry. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Doctah Samantha Mason. I am a Doctah of Internah Medication and a Pharmacist. Chemistry has always fascinated me as a wee lass. I remembah watching my Mother's equipment and beakahs, and her explanation of chemistry has always been simply...riveting. But, ah, there must be a valid reason as to why you are reading my guide, yes? You're as curious as I am about my profession, probably, and want an outlook on how I function in the lab. Say no more, say no more. I'll guide you, fellow (or aspiring!) chemist!

Now, the picture up top is your chemistry lab. Please note,




That is correct. You will be dealing wif chemicahs, and things can be easily flammable in the lab. You don't want to be set on foiyah, do you? It's...not pleasant, trust me on dat.


It's also important you wear your safety clothing. If you haf glasses such as myself and can't see things wifout it, the prescription glasses will haf to be substituted for your goggles, with an exchange of having your eyebrows singed off every damn day. I also recommend you keep long hair trimmed. My hair is constantly cut and maintained as to not get caught in equipment, but anything longah den mine will get trapped and ripped out. Now dis is outta the way...

The first thing you want to notice are dese machines ovah here.



Ah, the ChemMastah 3000, and the Chemicah Dispensah. Dese are your bread and buttah of your trade. The dispensah dispenses your chemicahs, and the ChemMastah 3000 makes dem into swanky bottles and pills for you, and even filtahs out the chemicahs you don't want in your product! Now, you will find the great debate about what's bettah for your medicah bay. Pills, or Bottles? In truth, every chemist is different. My style may not please other chemists as we all haf set ways, but for the sake of my own guide, dis is how I do things, and you can altah, remove, or add onto my own list as you please. (Keep in mind a pill bottle can only hold up to 14 pills. To rename your pill bottles, use the verb rename label!)



Dexalin Plus, (6 Bottles, 1 unit pills)

Better den dexalin in my opinion which only heals gradually, it nullifies all oxyloss, and combine wif inaprovaline, can stop a patient from going into critciah state quickly.



Anti-Toxin, (6 bottles, 10 unit pills)

Anti-Toxin, also known as it scientific name of Dylovene. Dis can heal toxins in the system, low livah damage from the drunkards across the haw, and speeds up recovahy from drug-related hallucinations and sleepiness.



Inaprovaline, (6 bottles, 10 unit pills)

Quite a stimulant here! Stabilizes patients, makes dem stop going into shock if dey're health is below 0%.



Bicardine, (6 bottles, 10 unit pills)

If someone taken a beaten, othawise known as "brute" damage", dis analgesic will help in the process of healing dat. An ovahdose on dis, it will gif your patient a slower rate of internah bleeding in cost of poisoning dem.



Dermaline, (6 bottles, 10 unit pills)

Dis little princess here cures burn damage. Works fastah den kerotane. Also prevents microbial growth.



Alkysine, (3 bottles, 5 unit pills)

Something I think a lot of people on the station needs prescribed, dis here treats brain damage slowly. Results in 2 units, instead of three!



Tramadol, (3 bottles, 10 unit pills)

Dis helps those who are in complete pain and need to wait for surgery by numbing the pain. Very effective for patients in shock, too! Make sure dey don't walk while on dis doe, it will damage the broken parts even more.



Hyronalin, (5 unit pills)

Radiation's a bitch. It causes toxin damage, and damages your internah organs. If someone got caught too close to the singularity or a bad rad storm, dis will do the trick along wif anti-toxin.



Spaceacillin (5 units pills)

Dis is your penicillin, basically. If you caught a virus in it's ratha early stages, gifing someone dis will probably cure dem (but it's a crapshoot chance), otherwise it prevents the virus from reaching later stages. It's also helps treats dastardly infections from cuts and injuries.



Peridaxon (4.2 unit pills)

Peridaxon. The experimentah non-invasive surgery in a pill. Can cure internal organ damage, even mend ruptured lungs. Howevah, the ovahdose on this is extremely low, and easy to poison someone wif. You haf to be careful wif how you use it, which of course is sparsely. Results in 1 units instead of 2.



Ryetalyn (1 unit pill)

Genetic damage? Disabilities due to mutation from radiation? Dis helps out in dat department.



Imidazoline, (3 bottles)

Put just a bit of dis in an eye dropper and administah to the eyes. Helps damage to the eye due to engineehs forgetting eye protection while welding or pink eye or whatevah. Can't heal a blind person or genetic damage, doe, as dat requires surgery.


Now, you are probably wondahing how I made these pills and bottle so pretty, why, all you haf to do is click on the photo of the pill or bottles. Easy, no?





90 units+9 pills=10 units each per pill

70 units+14 pills= 5 units each per pill

Now on to the explanation of the chemicah dispensah.




Keep in mind dat you can change how much you can dispense medicine, highlighted in blue. It's useful if you're trying to fit a batch into one beakah. Most medicines you will make will most likely be only 90 units, with some exceptions. Also, keep an eye on your meter highlighted in pink. As you use resources, the bah will deplete and will take a long while to rejuvenate fully. Dis is annoying if you're as fast as me wif chemistry. But eh, you'll live.

My next installment will be about dis amigo, and several "recipes" I made. See you soon, chemist!



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Welcome back to a second installment of Chemistry! Last time, I touched on the basis of Chemistry, and paged through my own personah list. Today, I am teaching you about...yes! Grenade making! You too can make explosives like toxins! Unlike toxins howevah, you should NEVAH make explosives wifout propah consent forms filled and in a CONTROLLED environment. Dat means, /DO NOT TEST GRENADES IN THE LAB/. Ask engineering to make you a testing chambah, or even ask science to play wif their test chambahs! Also ask your CMO for the form to allow you to make grenades, as well, so you won't sit in brig for making grenades! (as a side note, you should ADMIN HELP ESPECIALLY AS A TRAITOR IF YOU WANT TO USE GRENADES, FOR THEY CAN BE QUITE GANKY.)

Now dat we haf those unfun disclaimahs out of the way...let's make grenades!

What you will need is:

  • Igniter
  • Timer/Signaler (If you use signaler system make sure it's not on the common frequency, for anyone could detonate your grenade and you're gonna have a bad time.)
  • Grenade Casing
  • Screwdriver

I am going to assume you will use the timah/ignitah set up. The timah is set for 10 seconds, but dis can easily be adjusted by clicking a ready timah to modify it. By default, it's already ready so don't bother wif it. Pick up your ignitah, and screwdrivah it. Den attach it to your timah and screwdrivah it to get it ready.




Now let's set our assembly. Let's take our grenade casing, and put the assembly on it. It'll just pop right in.




Now here's the fun part. We can make chemicahs to put in the grenades! As a rule, only two bottles of any size can fit into it's casings. You can put some of dose nifty bluespace beakahs dat science can make! 600 units space cleaning grenade anyone?

But, let's take a look at the few chemicahs and dere effects to grenade making.


Foaming Agent

Dis is for making metal foam grenades. Easily confused wif Foam Surfactant.


Electromagnetic Pulse grenades...ugh, dis is dastardly. I heavily advise if you haf to make dis to use against clandestine machinery, dat anyone wif mechanicah parts stay clear, or else dey're going down too.

Flash Powder

Basis for a flashbang. Covah your eyes!

Foam Surfactant

Creates slippahy foam. Good for cleanah grenades!


Good for enhancing chemicah grenades. Ask a botanist to grow corn for you!


Foiyah grenades. Why would you make dis?


Explosive grenades, again, why would you make dis?


Creates smoke, which is good if you want to make a grenade for riot control. Or to look like a ninja.

For a small cheat-sheet, here are some safe grenades. I could tell you how to make nasty ones dat can melt the skin off someone in mere seconds, but it's funnah to test things on your own!

Metal Foam:

  • Bottle A: 30u Iron
  • Bottle B: 10u Foaming Agent, 10u Polytrinic Acid



  • Bottle A: 40x Foam Surfactant
  • Bottle B: 40x Water, 10x Space Cleaner

Ahkay, I assembled something. Let's test it! By the way, you should put the bottles in the grenades in any ordah, den screwdriver it shut.


Dese floohs look dirty...




Wooooo! Watch your step!






Amazing, isn't it...? I love my job. My last installment will be about dis room, and how to optimize it for your medicah staff!



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  • 7 months later...

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