A Message to Chip Getmore (Love you Mister Chip!)

[geeves]

Form: Proposal
Index: NT-COM-1839

From: NSS Aurora | Engineering | Chief Engineer | Kuhserze Ioraks
To: GetMore Holdings, Mendell | RnD Department Fwd. Chip Getmore

 

Hello there,

I am Kuhserze Ioraks, of the NSS Aurora, and I have drafted a proposal for an issue that has plagued us for roughly a century.

For about a year, I have been working closely with the Science department to test the effect of various weapons on various armour types, specifically fire and explosions, as well as the blunt impact of marble blocks fired through disposal chutes. I have come to have a great understanding of the methods that can be employed to guarantee safety against a great number of different attacks.

Introducing, GetMore Reflecto-Pad. A simple set-up created out of scrap (see, cheap!) material that otherwise would have gone into producing hair augments for dregs. This can easily be manufactored by untrained personnel hailing from Adhomai or further stretches of the Frontier. The GetMore branding will instantly make it a collector's item, as well as this decade's new fashion trend, rocketing prices to the top of the charts.

 

Below is a visual demonstration I have created to show the projected success of this product:

 

As you can see, this highly trained, highly valuable, and well loved Chef is about to fucking die. Let's fix this problem:

 

This chef will be able to go home and see his kids tonight. As well as generate massive profit as crew aboard stations across the galaxy are tricked into believing their food are provided for free. This is the power of the GetMore Reflecto-Pad.

You can contact me at cekioraks@ntnet.nt

Yours truly,
Kuhserze Ioraks | Chief Engineer | Inventor