MyBadMan

Hey. Revised the app and clarified dates, times, and motivations of the Adbmata'ke. Below are the summaries of the edits I made for some TL;DR To summarize, Mari learned about the hardships of Njarir rule and grew up with the racism that persisted after the first revolution. His dislike of the PRA began when he was young having been a discriminated against Zhan. After trying to fix this, I decided that it was a) not aligning with the timeline that I chose for my character and b) not necessary for the progression of my character. It was removed. As per your suggestion I edited the paragraph. Overall, his parents knew that a good engineer would be extremely useful to protect the Zhan in the case of another uprising and began saving early on. Two years before his parents announced to Mari that he would be attending NCCE, the formation of the ALA began after the assassination of Al-Mari. His parents were now assured that their son would be of great use to the Zhan and the ALA post his education. Edited paragraph to talk about crossing ALA/PRA borders and that he used the 'escaping ALA' excuse. The answer is hard to summarize, but the main points is that orders from Njarir will be viewed very negatively, humans and their orders will be followed due to the corporate necessity, and non-ALA Tajara will be treated with civility. However, Mari is not afraid to defend his beliefs. He follows given orders because he is afraid of being sent back to Nal'Tor labeled as a 'rebel'. Thanks for all the help and suggestions. Please let me know if my revisions were inadequate in any way. -MBM

Thanks for the feedback. I swear it wasn't random. I looked it up and shit I swear on me mum. The Abdmata'ke surname is "servent to mata'ke"... I think. And Marid'Ammar is The builder of revolution... I think. Anyways, those are good questions. The reason he can't go and fight for the ALA once again is due to the fact that he went to college that pays for your education by a post-graduation signup for NT. He was placed on the Exodus. I like the idea of him subtly promoting the ALA throughout his education. I will make some edits to include ways that he could support the Army. While it may be a weak reason, I would say that he is such a fanatic about his religion and beliefs that they would be very hard to shake. Thanks again for the help. -MBM

Hey, I know I memed in the OOC. However, I am actually going to leave some feedback. First off, I would consider running through with a quick revision (lord knows I could do that on my own app). You have a lot of uncessary commas and confused nouns. This is just an example of the clunky sentences written. That's not why you want feedback, though. When it comes to your character story, I genuinely enjoyed the little bit of 'boot processing' that preceded your character biography. What is lacking is an actual character description. I'm not sure what kind of 'person' I.C.E. is. There is little explanation of him before having been blown to bits. It does not clue the reader into how you will RP the character. What I would consider adding is more of a description of the background of your character. Don't remove anything, just consider beefing it up a little. This is not a paragraph. Consider adding something about how RPing this character will be different from your usual characters. Perhaps add something about how this character goes outside of your comfort zone or a piece of its backstory that you do enjoy. Overall, I have not seen you on station much so I can't testify to your roleplaying ability in great detail. For the few times I have seen you around, I have seen decent RP. If the app were to be revised, I would be willing to leave a +1. -MBM Edit: Change 'don't' to 'do' in my section about the "what do you like about this character".

Hey HunterRS, since you seem to be getting a lot of feedback, I thought I would throw a little more your way . Keep in mind I know very little about you, but have seen some of your characters about station. I mainly will be looking at your application's lore and whatnot. Firstly, I think it is good that you have had some experience with head of staff before. The one thing that concerns me is that you have made five applications for head of staff positions. I read through a couple of them, and it concerns me that they were taken down as per your request. If you thought you were unfit for the duty then, how have you changed? Having made five of these now, I'd assume know what issue people have with you. I don't see a very solid argument in your application, so I would seriously consider editing one in. If the application was taken down because you were opposed to the feedback, then you really should rethink applying for a head of staff position. As a head, it is not rare that you will receive flak from many of your department staff. Moving into the actually application part of this application, there is one thing that troubles me. I have no idea if it has been mentioned already, because I could not be bothered to read through all 6 pages of responses. Your character gets arrested frequently for being immature. On what level do you think that makes them eligible to be a head of staff? It in no way warrants him not having a job, however do you honestly think a character who gets arrested is fit to be a head of staff? It's okay to mess around, but if it is getting you brigged I'd calm down the level of chucklefuckery. Other than that, I have seen some OOC stuff as of recent that is a little troubling, but what I have seen is not enough to give a + or - 1. Sorry for the essay. Hope it helps! -MBM

BYOND Key: MyBadMan Character Names: Parker Klingsworth Species you are applying to play: Tajara What color do you plan on making your first alien character (Dionaea & IPCs exempt): Dark grey (RGB 30, 30, 30) Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: Yes Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question Why do you wish to play this specific race: While I do enjoy playing a human, being a different race poses an interesting challenge in playing something you are not. It gives the opportunity for creativity and being apart of a new idea and creation. The reason I am applying specifically for Tajara lies in the lore behind them. I am very interested and impressed with the level of thought and writing that has gone into this species. I appreciate the lore for all the other species, but this one intrigues me the most. I am excited by the chance to participate in a still open and changing conflict between different factions. It poses a great way to strike up RP with other Tajara on the station (or well informed humans, for that matter). The religions pose a great way to express your character. In addition, the use of maps and pictures of the Tajara on the wiki help the reader to visualize what they will be playing. Finally, I really appreciate the diversity of different ethnic groups and the tension between them. There are a multitude of different ethnicities each with their own specific trait. Not only is playing a Tajara different and new, but the different ethnicities offer an ability to keep trying new things as a whitelisted player. Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: To start off, the in-game mechanics between Tajara and Humans are a little different. Tajara can not generally wear closed toed shoes, need special gloves, and cannot use hardsuits due to their nails and digitigrade appendages. Tajara see much better in the dark than humans do. Tajara do more damage when physically attacking someone due to their long, sharp nails. Tajara are far more affected by heat, and less affected by the cold due to their fur. In addition, they speak a different language (Siik’maas). Moving out of the in-game mechanics, there are a few cultural traits that make Tajara different. Firstly, they have a tail and ears that can be used while emoting. They have a strong genetic history of rolling their ‘Rs’ and referring to oneself in the third person (unless they trust who they are speaking with greatly). For example: “He enjoys the jerrrky verry much.” I think the biggest difference, however, is the current war occurring on their home planet. The three factions fighting for power and the intense tension between them makes for RP opportunities between other Tajara. Character Name: Marid’Ammar Abdmata’ke Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs Marid’Ammar, or Mari (Mah-Ree) was born into the Abdmata’ke family in 2433. He was born into a strictly Mata’ke household in the northern region. Quizosa was home to a small number of Liberation families, including the Abdmata’ke. His given name means the constructor of rebellion. From birth, his parents and elders had been teaching him the history of Adhomai. He learned of the hardships under the Njarir Plutocracy until the first uprising. People from his village gave light to the freedom that the Tajara felt when overthrowing their masters. Mari gained a deep rooted dislike of the Njarir and those who supported them. Mari grew up with the still-high racial tensions post war, allowing him to experience the prejudice against the Khan first hand. By the time he began to form his own ideas, his path of thought was already well laid out for him. His disdain for the PRA had already begun due to him having seen little to no change in racial tensions after the first revolution. Like his father, Mari began working in construction. He learned electrical wiring and the basics of construction from his father and the city. In 2453, much to his surprise and dismay, Mari was told his parents had been saving for him to attend the Nal’tor College of Career Excellence. Mari hated the idea. He simply could not conceive being around Tajara who believed in the crimes against Zhan committed by the People’s Republic. His parents' thinking was not far from his. However, they saw great value in the talent Mari had. They had foreseen the necessity of a skilled engineer when the tensions finally broke once again. When 2451 came and the ALA formed, the Abdmata'ke were quick to align themselves with it (along with the rest of Quizosa). His parents instructed him to become one of the best Tajaran engineers in history and return to serve the ALA. Mari was obedient and eventually saw the necessity of his skills in the coming war. The trip to Nal'Tor was eye-opening for Mari. He ventured through the tense border skirmishes between the PRA and ALA. It was dangerous and terrifying to the Tajara who had spent little time outside of their village. In order to get across the border itself, Mari and the other Tajara in his group lied about wanting to 'escape back to the PRA and avoid ALA rule'. Being Zhan, they were searched and roughed up, although they were eventually cleared and let pass into PRA territory. Upon arrival at NCCE, Mari met many new Tajara and began to see all new walks of life. The population at NCCE was mostly made up of loyalists. Mari was outspoken throughout his life. It was very difficult to not promote his beliefs openly. Mari got involved with a group of printers whom had been spreading ALA propaganda to Nal'Tor. It had little to no effect on the population, although that didn't stop Mari from helping them to spread information against the PRA. Mari was careful as he knew the penalty would be death to those who had been found to oppose Republican rule. Mari and others who had revealed themselves as ALA rebels to him remained firm in their beliefs.After four years, Mari received his degree in engineering. Regardless of his wants, he was contracted by NT immediately after his graduation. This was partially how his education was afforded. His appointment to the NSS Exodus (or Aurora depending on whatever station we are running at this point) was selected by his employment officer. Today (or the acceptance day of his app) will be the first day Mari works on a real space station. He has great disdain for the cooperation he works for, but understands the necessity of the work he is slated to do. Mari is now 25. Even with his hate of the PRA/Human megacorperations and their mistreatment of the Zhan, he will be compliant with orders from his heads of staff and security. Even in ALA rule, Juntas (military leaders) have primary control over civilization. Mari can see the necessity of a chain of command and the requirement of workers to take orders to sustain a space station. As for the Humans on the station, Mari will be very distrusting. He knows that the Humans who work on the station are not the same as those who purchase cheap Tajara work. However, Mari himself has prejudice against the nature of humanity as his little experience with it prior to the station has been negative. Mari will follow orders- while being pessimistic and reluctant- given by CC. When it comes to other Tajara on station, Mari will be extremely contradictory if not refusing to follow orders given to him by Njarir. Luckily, the population of Njarir is extremely low. He will treat loyalists with civility but nothing more. Mari recognizes the fight is fought down on Adhomai and not on the Exodus (/Aurora). This does not mean that when mistreated Mari will be complacent. He will defend himself and what he believes in. The main reason for his safe behavior is the fear that he will lose his job and be sent back to Nal'Tor labeled as a rebel. And that would certainly lead to his hanging. What do you like about this character? I enjoy the passion that Mari has. He has a great want to help save the Tajara from the fate they have imposed on themselves. He is near religious in his following of the Liberation Army, which will prove to be a very interesting dynamic to play out. Seldom do I have a character so devoted to some ideal. I also appreciate the fierceness of Mari. Having worked north in the cold and harsh conditions, I can appreciate the courage that he will bring to the table. I am very excited to do my best to RP this character out (granted this app is accepted, of course). How would you rate your role-playing ability? Probably a solid 7.5/10. Notes: How do you like the name? I did some research and am doing my best not to butcher the naming style of Arabic culture. I looked up parts of the name. Not sure if it looks to meh, though. Also, is it Mata'ke or Ma'ta'ke? I have seen it both ways now. Edit: Revision and addition of content based on feedback. Added question. Edit: Revision & Addition of content based on Mofo's feedback. See reply for more information.

Just here to add my two cents to Ziy. I must say that after having played a few dead hours with only Ziy and I online, I can vouch for their ability to roleplay. More than once have I been greatly impressed with the thought that goes into their emotes, way of speaking, and character backstories/outlines. Having spoken to Ziy OOC, I can confirm they are a genuinely nice person and are very friendly to work with. I was a dipshit coming in with many questions and confusion. Ziy remained helpful and friendly throughout it. I am absolutely sure they will make a fantastic Unathi, as they RP and adapt to situations very well. Definitely a +1

Good RP and is up to snuff in my opinion! They frequently RPs things out in a very convincing and genuine way. Good time playing with them over in medical. I believe they would make a fine Skrell. +1