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Much Ado to Identity Crises

Guest 1138

By Guest 1138
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Posted (edited)

I've come to the personal conclusion that I've done too much wrong. I've realized a little too late of my failings.


Firstly, a story. Let me tell you about a guy who went by the nickname 'Vix'. He stylized himself as a pure-blooded Slavic man who gave no fucks, was outrageously offensive and insensitive to others. But the point of his little gimmick was to have fun being an absolute asshole, at one point. In reality, he wasn't really that terrible of a person and all of it was just an act to him. He figured, "If I'm only pretending to be subhuman degenerate trash, it's not a problem, now is it?"


He was quite the outrageous douchebag, and he had trouble fitting into places. Except, among other assholes and people who didn't take him seriously, as he had intended. It'd be extremely generous to say he was misunderstood, because the bottom line was that he was still a cocksucker that should burn several times over in hell. A true human degenerate, that being the bottom line. He didn't care, though.


The guy was a manipulator, a false reflection of an actual human being. He openly embraced corruption, and used other people for his own amusement. A textbook case of a sociopath. If I haven't gotten the message across, the guy's a true assclown.


Now let me tell you about me, and how I got here. I wasn't always known as Delta, or as 1138, or whatever numerical sequence in that order or relation to Republic Commando. This identity was meant to be an act as well. At some point I had values. I had morals, I had a specific code of honor and conduct. I was to be simply splendid to other people, to embrace others as though they were my brother or my sister. I was to be close, daring, someone who would be willing to sacrifice anything and everything for other people.


A good person. I was supposed to be a good person. I was supposed to be inspiring like a real soldier would be. Someone to look up to and say, "Now look at that, what a fantastic example, huh?"


I think the mistake I made was that either I tried too hard or I didn't try hard enough. Either way, I sucked horribly at fulfilling what I wanted to be.


Because of that, I think it's time I truly move on. This time, I don't have any reason to stay. I have more reason to be forcibly removed, to be honest, and I think I serve as an example of who you shouldn't be.


Now. I'm going to fuck off and not return. I'd ask kindly that none of you ask me to return or try to reason with me to stay. Those of you that I respect, you know who you are. I'm available to chat for a few more days before I start deleting every trace of myself. Do note that trying to tell me that I should stay will end in me telling you to fuck off, regardless of who you are. Sorry, it's nothing personal, but I am not a nice person and I'm not about to manipulate, deceive or mislead any longer. I'm known as the resident forum villain, so I figure it'd be pointless to try to convince anyone otherwise and cry boohoo about it.


At any rate, I had fun, but the point of the matter is that I am not having fun with this place nor am I having fun coming to terms with myself any longer. Part of the point of this goodbye is to apologize for any amount of suffering, grief or cyberterrorism I caused with my reckless, arrogant and self-destructive attitude. For what it's worth.


So. Adieu. Post if you will, I'm not actually going to respond, since I'm going to bug SoundScopes to have my forum account disabled.


I'll keep my pager and my skype/steam on. Toodles.


OP's a fag and doesn't take himself seriously, though.

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Guest

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Posted
Posted (edited)

I've come to the personal conclusion that I've done too much wrong. I've realized a little too late of my failings.


Firstly, a story. Let me tell you about a guy who went by the nickname 'Vix'. He stylized himself as a pure-blooded Slavic man who gave no fucks, was outrageously offensive and insensitive to others. But the point of his little gimmick was to have fun being an absolute asshole, at one point. In reality, he wasn't really that terrible of a person and all of it was just an act to him. He figured, "If I'm only pretending to be subhuman degenerate trash, it's not a problem, now is it?"


He was quite the outrageous douchebag, and he had trouble fitting into places. Except, among other assholes and people who didn't take him seriously, as he had intended. It'd be extremely generous to say he was misunderstood, because the bottom line was that he was still a cocksucker that should burn several times over in hell. A true human degenerate, that being the bottom line. He didn't care, though.


The guy was a manipulator, a false reflection of an actual human being. He openly embraced corruption, and used other people for his own amusement. A textbook case of a sociopath. If I haven't gotten the message across, the guy's a true assclown.


Now let me tell you about me, and how I got here. I wasn't always known as Delta, or as 1138, or whatever numerical sequence in that order or relation to Republic Commando. This identity was meant to be an act as well. At some point I had values. I had morals, I had a specific code of honor and conduct. I was to be simply splendid to other people, to embrace others as though they were my brother or my sister. I was to be close, daring, someone who would be willing to sacrifice anything and everything for other people.


A good person. I was supposed to be a good person. I was supposed to be inspiring like a real soldier would be. Someone to look up to and say, "Now look at that, what a fantastic example, huh?"


I think the mistake I made was that either I tried too hard or I didn't try hard enough. Either way, I sucked horribly at fulfilling what I wanted to be.


Because of that, I think it's time I truly move on. This time, I don't have any reason to stay. I have more reason to be forcibly removed, to be honest, and I think I serve as an example of who you shouldn't be.


Now. I'm going to fuck off and not return. I'd ask kindly that none of you ask me to return or try to reason with me to stay. Those of you that I respect, you know who you are. I'm available to chat for a few more days before I start deleting every trace of myself. Do note that trying to tell me that I should stay will end in me telling you to fuck off, regardless of who you are. Sorry, it's nothing personal, but I am not a nice person and I'm not about to manipulate, deceive or mislead any longer. I'm known as the resident forum villain, so I figure it'd be pointless to try to convince anyone otherwise and cry boohoo about it.


At any rate, I had fun, but the point of the matter is that I am not having fun with this place nor am I having fun coming to terms with myself any longer. Part of the point of this goodbye is to apologize for any amount of suffering, grief or cyberterrorism I caused with my reckless, arrogant and self-destructive attitude. For what it's worth.


So. Adieu. Post if you will, I'm not actually going to respond, since I'm going to bug SoundScopes to have my forum account disabled.


I'll keep my pager and my skype/steam on. Toodles.


OP's a fag and doesn't take himself seriously, though.

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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)

I advise that you just take a break from the computer for a while. For real. Just, try doing something else. Reading, maybe. Focus on schoolwork, or meeting people. You're really getting way too caught up in all this.


I was too, but not to your extent. Then I left. By now I've stopped playing. Previously I was quite addicted, and overuse of the game and playing at late hours was a major contributing factor to me having to drop one course and failing another my first semester at college. And the next semester, it was still an issue.


Just cut it off, don't go back to it like you did all the other times you've said you'd leave. And I'm not saying this to be a dick. I'm legit concerned here.


And, before you go.

EDIT:

Nevermind, you've quit smoking. Just. Don't binge drink, alright? Not over this.

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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)

I advise that you just take a break from the computer for a while. For real. Just, try doing something else. Reading, maybe. Focus on schoolwork, or meeting people. You're really getting way too caught up in all this.


I was too, but not to your extent. Then I left. By now I've stopped playing. Previously I was quite addicted, and overuse of the game and playing at late hours was a major contributing factor to me having to drop one course and failing another my first semester at college. And the next semester, it was still an issue.


Just cut it off, don't go back to it like you did all the other times you've said you'd leave. And I'm not saying this to be a dick. I'm legit concerned here.


And, before you go.

EDIT:

Nevermind, you've quit smoking. Just. Don't binge drink, alright? Not over this.

Edited by Guest
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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)
Why do you think I'm going?

So. Adieu. Post if you will, I'm not actually going to respond, since I'm going to bug SoundScopes to have my forum account disabled.

But seriously, consider it. This shit is not healthy for you, and you know it.


You're telling people about how you've taken up substance abuse because of this game, twice.


I really, really think you should take a break, maybe of a few months at the least. Because you've made choices that have actual seriousface consequences, in what I can only assume is an attempt to fish for sympathy.

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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)
Why do you think I'm going?

So. Adieu. Post if you will, I'm not actually going to respond, since I'm going to bug SoundScopes to have my forum account disabled.

But seriously, consider it. This shit is not healthy for you, and you know it.


You're telling people about how you've taken up substance abuse because of this game, twice.


I really, really think you should take a break, maybe of a few months at the least. Because you've made choices that have actual seriousface consequences, in what I can only assume is an attempt to fish for sympathy.

Edited by Guest
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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)
They're fucking cigarettes, it's not crack cocaine. Really?

You started smoking over a fucking videogame. And then you implied that you had started binge-drinking. You don't say that you've just 'taken up drinking' in that context to say that you're doing that stuff in moderation and being a responsible adult, which you now legally are. Given that you currently reside in the United States, you aren't even drinking age yet.

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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted (edited)
They're fucking cigarettes, it's not crack cocaine. Really?

You started smoking over a fucking videogame. And then you implied that you had started binge-drinking. You don't say that you've just 'taken up drinking' in that context to say that you're doing that stuff in moderation and being a responsible adult, which you now legally are. Given that you currently reside in the United States, you aren't even drinking age yet.

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Erik Tiber Head of Personnel

Erik Tiber

Posted
Posted

Well, to gauge the performance of these various threads over time, I've taken the liberty of creating a graph.

 

AbGYgq0.png?1

 

As you can see, there's a clear spike in activity around May. Allow me to explain why that is not indicative of a larger trend.


Now, I've been taking a stats course. Delta has only made six threads so far regarding either a leave of absence or plans/indications thereof, so I don't have too many data points to work with. But, I can determine that the thread from may was a likely outlier in the trend.


To explain, let's do some statistical analysis.

Sample: 3, 5, 12, 15, 15, 73

Q1=5

Median: 13.5

Q3=15

Interquartile range = 10


Now, determining the outlier from the interquartile range, any values lower than -1.5 or higher than 28.5 would be considered outliers. The value of the standard deviation would likely yield similar results.


From this, we can now clean up our sample to more accurately gauge the amount of attention a hypothetical "Delta leaves" thread would receive at a given point in time. Looking at it this way, there appears to be a gradual increase around the first half of the year, before stagnating at 15. Although the value for this thread is 12 now, this is likely to rise. This would give us a clear but steady increase over the course of the year. By this time next year, you can expect each thread to be yielding somewhere around 25 posts a pop. Pretty anemic growth, but it's still a feat to sustain that growth over such a long period of time.


Whether we'll actually see this come to fruition, however, depends on whether the outcome of this thread will resemble the outcome of the past five.


In all seriousness; actions speak louder than words.


BREAKING NEWS: I have just been informed that I missed one of the data points.


This really overturns my previous hypothesis. Now, the trend is far more irregular, the growth much more gradual.

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