Unban Request - Kihatomay

[Kiha]

BYOND Key: Kihatomay

Total Ban Length: 7 days

Banning staff member's Key: Alberyk

Reason of Ban: Punching an armed mercenary because they were in research while breaking cameras, don't really need to explain how silly it is to do it, you have a lot of notes since you started to play here.

Reason for Appeal: First, I am ashamed that I have to make this post in the first place. I am extremely sorry for any inconvenience my failure to grasp conflict escalation as expected on the server has caused, and I'm trying to break some really bad habits that I've acquired from many many years of playing other lower roleplay servers. There isn't an experience like Aurora anywhere else, and that is why I have been trying so hard to acclimate fully into the environment, however I keep hitting one wall: Conflict. I admit that I am again and again having issues with properly engaging in conflict both as an antagonist, and against antagonists. I am sorry for this, and I have been in contact with admins more often than I haven't when I do end up in conflict situations.  But, in response to the many notes I have, which I myself have seen, many of them seem to not properly portray my conversations that they are referring to. In almost all of the conversations the notes are referring to, it ended on a positive note and the problem did not arise again. One exception for this was a note referring to a round where I played as ninja and took apart an ERT team and ISD with hit-and-run tactics while they were actively hunting for me. They died, and adminhelped, because I ambushed them very aggressively and effectively, giving them little to no chance to actually fight back. The same thing occurred again briefly but turned out to be a fair exchange of lethal force, and I have been making efforts to provide openings and opporunity for interaction before doing things like that since. Often when I am playing antag, I will see in AOOC that 'x amount of time has passed and it still feels like extended', or something similar, and this makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong, or that I'm not doing my job, so I ramp it up a bit, and then the bwoinks come. As I said, I am having a hard time finding the sweet spot for reactions/applied force when antags are involved, be it me as the antag or another person. But overall, I am not a griefer, I actively engage in the lore, and I try to play engaging characters. This is where my next point begins, as I have noticed that many, if not all of my problems come from when I am playing the character James Praxton, as he is a confrontational character and aggressive by nature. The most recent issue with James Praxton is was resulted in my ban, where a mercenary came into RnD, I had been working on some stuff for security to help them with 'a threat' as I was told, prior to them entering the department. They came in, started tampering with equipment, and when I asked them what they were doing here, and announced the stranger's presence in my lab over the radio, they wordlessly started dismantling cameras. I examined them, and didn't see any weapons on their person, which was a mistake, because I skimmed over the first few lines of their items. It is a bad habit, as normally on my screen belt-stowed weapons show up lower in the examine lines, but they had the weapon stored on their exosuit storage slot. I didn't see it, and so I decided to punch them for coming in and starting to dismantle the chemistry lab. Suddenly, to my confusion, they pulled out a sub-machine gun ( the weapon I missed) and shot me, but I was already clicking, so I punched again and they fell down. Panicking as I was in a fight or flight situation, I grabbed the dropped gun and fired it two times before I reached the door at which I dropped the gun and fled the room. It was shortly after that Alberyk contacted me. Once again, an issue occured while I was playing James Praxton. So, whether or not this ban is lifted, I am going to either remove him from my character list or rework his personality to better suit the fact that I am still getting used to this server's perspective on conflict and reaction to antagonists, and vice versa. When I play my other characters, Many Walks In Space, Thr'us Zuhlisk, etc, I have no issues, and have a good time, that is what has brought me to this conclusion. Again, I apologize, to the player who played Tanya, the mercenary, as well as anyone else who I have caused the fun to be lost in a round. It was not my intention, and I am trying to be a better player. This ban has been something of a wake-up call, for lack of better words to describe how I feel about it, and I want a chance to prove that it was prematurely judged necessary. I have learned my lesson, and I am able to admit my mistakes and move forward to correct them.

Edited January 31, 2020 by Kiha

[Alberyk]

As I said, you have a lot of notes, warnings and even an antag ban in the in the span of two weeks. To make things more clear:
 

Your reaction here to someone, that your character probably does not even know who they are, disabling a single camera is running at them and punching their face. I don't see any real reason to lift this ban, you were spoken more than ten times just this month about your behavior. And from what I am seeing, it is not only related to a single character. Sorry, but I do really believe that you deserve this ban and its entire duration.

[Kiha]

I have been spoken to, yes, because I quite often am antag, as very few others apparently have the roles selected. And when you do things as an antagonist, people tend to adminhelp. This has been pointed out to me before. When people die in a round, they are not usually happy about it. I have two warnings, one pertaining to remembering to properly employ escalation, and the other because I was jumping out of stealth mode to attack ISD and TCFL who were actively hunting and shooting at me with lethals on sight.

I understand that what happened in that cataclysm round can't go without punishment, I do. I have a lot of notes, yes. All I can really do to prove I want to improve actively is suggest that if you do lift the ban before it ends, I am willing to accept any conditions of scrutiny towards my behavior in the game you would like for however long you would like, as there are some canonical events coming up very soon and I would really like to participate in them. I know that canonical event rounds are more heavily regulated than others, at least from my last participated event, and so I feel it could be a good way to prove I can and will do better moving forward.

If you don't remove the ban before the duration ends, I'm still going to make improvements as a player moving forward. As I have said before I really enjoy this server, and I don't want to lose my privilege to be a player on it, I feel like I've shown only complete cooperation with staff when they have contacted me, and I have never intended to ruin a round for anyone, I'm deeply apologetic if this has happened.

Edited January 31, 2020 by Kiha

[Resilynn]

I want to clarify about that warning for not properly escalating. I assume that’s when you killed me. 

You were ahelped by three different people from that, from what I gathered from ghost chat, not because I was mad that I died but because I had literally not even seen your character yet that round, let alone spoken to him or done anything, and you came up and dominated a surgeon into decapitating me while I was out on a surgical table.  It went from no interaction to murder while I was only semi-conscious and completely unable to move. You didn’t even interact with the surgeon you had kill me beyond the dominate. 

 

Please don’t dismiss this kind of murder boning as people just getting salty that they died. 

[Kiha]

No, that's not what I was talking about. That was what led to my recent antagonist ban, and I spoke to one staff member. And I admit I felt really bad when it happened because I did not want him to cut your head off. I wanted him to cut you once or twice in the head with the scalpel beside you to stir up conflict and dissent among medical staff but he took the dominate message of 'Cut his throat' which in hindsight was extremely poor wording and I regret using that phrasing, as 'Kill the CMO' and chose to saw your head off. I'm sorry that happened, I am, as I was hoping to create a horror scene, not grief you.

The proper escalation warning was during a round where I had been laying relatively low as cultist, secretly blocking some airlocks with wall runes, and near the end of the round, I began to create a barrier that would have barred off Red Dock, but I left the runes inactive. This was more than a week ago.

Edited January 31, 2020 by Kiha

[Kiha]

It's been four days just about since the ban and I've had a lot of time to think about my actions overall since I've come back to the server a few weeks ago, could you please at least consider my request to shorten the time of the ban? I really want to be a part of the community again and have a chance to participate in the coming events. I know I did wrong, and I will do better.

[Alberyk]

No, sorry. You were given a lot of chances. You will stay banned.

Appeal denied.