Vysoka Rewrite

[Wigglesworth Jones]

Type: Planet

Short Description: Vysoka now has a lot more content.

How will this be reflected on-station?: Items, character concepts, mobs.

Does this addition do anything not achieved by what already exists?: There's more stuff for Vysoka that previously wasn't there, so yes. 

Do you understand that the project may change over time in ways that you may not foresee once it is handed over to the Lore Team? Yes.

Long Description:

Canon and I worked on this rework for about a year and a half, maybe longer. It took so long because it's hard to ever really stop developing something, but I think it's been in the oven long enough. There's still some more work to be done, but any of that would take significantly longer to complete. There are three documents - one general rework, one about Vysokan religion, and one about Vysokan culture . There's a lot, so I understand if not all of it gets added. Note that any of the good parts were written by me, while Canon wrote all the bad stuff. 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/12xw-ygd3DigBwhKTrYATZPerP2ifY66-_KcO_I4jKSY/edit?usp=sharing
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lNHfcKb9LrrzfYQbTIW-zBWmo6NSjItJY3-xjdyBYmo/edit?usp=sharing
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZHPGcmS3RMvmtLBCxKe7k87gpAK97coSBokkWcsdmCs/edit?usp=sharing

Thanks to anyone I sent this to for feedback. 

[Montyfatcat]

First of all: FUCK YES! This adds to a planet I was already interested in and perfectly captures the more reasonable spirit of it, rather than the weirdly high amount of hosts on station.

Second: "Be it open steppes, beaches, the seas themselves, or deep in the mountains, towns cannot escape the changes to their culture or lives that Vysoka’s geography brings to them. " Does this imply that Vysoka has floating towns of some kind? If so, could we get those elaborated on slightly?

Third: Specific date for the Velhalktai? It would be really cool if all of the Vysokans could collectively start buzzing about it, as well as if there was a news arc covering it. Would help draw some attention to the lore without being reliant on major conflict (not opposed to a doping scandal mind you)

Fourth: I love the emphasis on being a friendly culture, I think that's really needed in the current loresphere with how hostile a lot of planets and species are to outsiders currently. Whether this will translate in game is another thing, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Fifth: "Younger Vysokans are sometimes embarrassed by the common “stereotype” of throat-singing and shy away from talking about it in public." This kind of depth is really needed, where something that directs the flow of RP without being politics or something that heavily stereotypes a group.

Sixth: I love all the ties to other aspects of the lore, helps it feel like a real part of the universe instead of each planet suffering isolated writing syndrome, capable of mostly being their own lore in a standalone.

Seventh: Having what conflict there is not be just the international stage in small form, and having other cultures show up in relevant roles, is fucking perfect and we need more of it. Between the Himeans causing trouble in the mines, the drug epidemic and the conflct between city states, there's enough to talk about in character without it devolving into wider politics over and over.

 

Huge fucking support for this update, and I hope this sets a gold standard for human lore revisions.

[Montyfatcat]

ALSO ALSO ALSO

Let's have a named sports team for each city state, since sports is absolutely a conversation topic!

[Wigglesworth Jones]

Thanks for the positive feedback! Let me address all of your points.
1. Floating towns weren't something I originally considered - "the sea themselves" is, sadly, just the coast. Floating city-states, however, are something I can consider in the future. (No promises, of course.)

2. That wouldn't be too hard to add at all! I'll say it's... March 10th or so, and add it to the Velhalktai paragraph. 

3. Hospitality's a very important part of the cultures Vysoka draws upon, so it was important to have it reflected in the lore - although it was already mentioned in the original draft, elaborating on it certainly isn't a bad thing.

4. Definitely didn't do this because I wanted to avoid it becoming a meme. 

5. Yeah, that ends up happening a lot in lore. One thing I regret being unable to add to the rework was a mention of Himeo fielding a missile cruiser captured by Vysoka, as the whole section about the Khalagdal was too large to add fully.

6. Glad you like it! With Vysoka really only being relevant on the galactic stage for the food output, "small problems" tend to fit the planet's theming more than any huge crises.  

7. That'll take a little bit to do, but I can certainly try and come up with some names for them. 

[ImmortalRedshirt]

So, it's no small surprise that Vysoka, as a planet, has held my interest since starting here, partially from its blending of a very familiar environment with completely unfamiliar things. I can confidently say that this rewrite far and away surpasses the current version in almost every regard. I'll start off with some questions and criticisms first to get those out of the way:

• Dainshu are mentioned quite a few times throughout the document, though a description isn't included. I assume they will remain mostly unchanged from how they are now?
• The current state of the hosts is unclear, in that it's hard to determine if they're getting on just fine or if the entire concept of the host society is breaking apart at the seams, mainly due to the examples listed(interesting as they are...)
• In regards to the usvolo, most modern, non-electronic instruments rarely consist entirely of plastic(speaking from my own experiences, it could be different elsewhere)
• The culture document mentions some offworld groups creating subcultures within the cities. This doesn't need any major elaboration if you don't feel like it, but having a sentence or two that gives readers an idea of how things might merge would be handy.

Really, I'm just nitpicking at this point, there's so much more I liked about it:

• The new flag is great in a way I'm not entirely sure how to explain why
• Speaking of flags, I love how every single city and host that's written about has a flag attached to them. Think I might put them together in a program later, just to see how they'd actually look
• The multipolar nature of how the planet is organized is pretty unique in human lore, and the only thing that comes close are the Scarabs, albeit much less so. The implications that this has caused conflict in the past are also really intriguing and I can't wait to see the history get fully formed.
• Giving other parts of the lore their own ways to interact with Vysoka in both positive and negative ways goes a long way to making it feel more in-depth(such as the various views the people have towards Himean syndicates.)
• Spelling out the fact that hosts make up a smaller portion of the population is much-needed and should help the planet move away from common stereotypes.
• Speaking of stereotypes, the attitudes towards throat singing are a very smart idea(very good choices for popular genres of music too, I am not biased in any way)
• Having technology outside the cities be a strange mix of old and new in the same object is a really nice direction. I'm just imagining a tractor like the one in my avatar being integrated with all sorts of the sophisticated precision technologies the modern farmer uses, but with even more futuristic tech
• The position of IPCs within Stolitism was a surprise when I first saw it, but in a good way. Stolitism in general is really good
• Most importantly...the fact that this rewrite focuses way more on the life and society of Vysokans than the government and politics is what has earned a considerable portion of my favor. To me, it'll always be the most important part of any world's lore because it's something that players can actually use

This post does feel a bit rambly and incoherent at some points, and is definitely weighted more towards positive feedback, but I feel it is something this application very much deserves. Amazing work here.

Edited April 22, 2022 by ImmortalRedshirt

[Wigglesworth Jones]

1. I completely forgot about Dainshu, to be honest. I knew I had missed something. I hadn't intended on changing much about how they were originally described, of course. I'll get a paragraph done about them.
2. The hosts are fine - remember, "a steady stream of new recruits is the norm for all but the most controversial hosts". The Great Serpents are going to fall apart sooner or later, yes - but confederacies are described as "short-lived" for a reason. 
3. I did not know that. 
4. No promises, but I can definitely see about brainstorming something.

I'm glad you liked Stolitism - it took me many, many rewrites to get it in a position I was happy with. I felt that Vysoka hating IPCs would have been overdone, honestly - so I wanted to do something unique with it. 

[Lucaken]

I was a proof-reader for much of the development process of these documents, so it’s no surprise I like it. Any questions I may have had were covered by Red and Monty.

My only real concern is length - although I would struggle to cut anything from this as all of it is of good quality, I think the culture document does start to stretch it all, and was where I lost the most interest overall. If this has to fit in just one page, trimming it and the religion page may be necessary - though that is more of a job for the writers. Otherwise, this has my +1.

[Wigglesworth Jones]

Your feedback was appreciated during this whole process. Also - trust me when I say that it will look considerably shorter once it's on the wiki. (Although parts can be removed if need be.)

[Haydizzle]

I haven't had a chance to look through all of it with a scrutinizing lens, but I will say what I've seen so far looks wonderful. I had the honor of helping with the religious sections, and Wigglesworth was cooperative, creative, and fun to work with to boot. I personally think the length of it all isn't terrible for a one-off planet (around 50k characters before HTML formatting), but I'd understand if some cuts had to be made by the human devs. I'll hopefully swing back around to give some actual feedback provided I have the time, but a majority of this would have my support anyway so +1. Good luck!

[SilverSZ]

I forgot to respond to this until now. But I helped somewhat by providing feedback and ideas for the section on synthetics on the planet. I don't think the length is too bad and some creative wiki structuring would help a lot in making it appear less long whilst in general keeping the length. Personally I think both the Human and Synthetic additions are very good and something I would personally enjoy making a character from, and would be a quality addition to a planet that whilst good doesn't really reach it's potential with it's current offerings. +1

[The7thLain]

Hello friends. After consideration and deliberation in the loreteam, we have decided to accept this submission! We'll be reaching out to you soon with how to best implement this on the wiki. Myself and my deputies are happy to have this kind of content in our lore. Thank you for the submission, and congratulations.