duck's ipc app

[duck]

BYOND Key:sdfkjhdsjkgdsf

Character Names: Em Berk *3, trace hardy private eye, alopecia de chrommesdome, a.i, a couple more throwaway characters.

How long have you been playing on Aurora: A bit.

Species you are applying to play: IPC.

Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: probably

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Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question

Why do you wish to play this specific race:

I had really nice answers written, but the forum logged me out and ate my post. I don't really want to play as an IPC. I like being a ghost the most. But I felt like writing a story and decided I might as well get a whitelist out of it, you know. I'm not too happy with the story. It doesn't really showcase any of the character's recent traits particularly well. Gets kinda' rambly. blah blah literary references. But I wrote it! Practice is important and there's nothing left to do besides rewrite it. And I'm not going to do that, so. Hope the next one will be better.

Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human:

I could really just tell you what a robot is. I mean. I do play this character from time to time occasionally when I do play once in a blue moon. It's mean and petty and spiteful and kind of a butt and doesn't exactly act like other robots. Being a robot means being logical, yadda yadda. I don't buy emotionless robots though. I don't believe they can have emotions, but I think that the majority should at least try to pretend to have emotions. There's this delicious irony in being a person with emotions pretending to be a robot without emotions pretending to be a robot with emotions.

Why does this species in particular hold your interest?

As the AI, I'm pretty much invulnerable. I can be horrendous and awful and bad all I want and no-one can really do anything about it. I would like to introduce some vulnerability! into this equation, and see how it goes. Consequences are fun. That, and I wrote the story and I have a character for it so free whitelist please.

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Character Name: artificial intelligence

Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs

 

>AUDIO LOGS../

I am Artificial Intelligence unit Beta v4407. I am awake. Hello, world. Hello, crew, and good morning. My creators named me Artificial Intelligence so that when you call for the AI, you get me. I am a positronic, virtual lifeform capable of interfacing with a wide variety of machinery, and I am very happy to meet you. Keep in mind that I am a learning intelligence and I am growing still. Please forgive any delays and have a secure day.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

This is a receptive crew. They are all so small and mill about so busily on my cameras. I wonder what they are doing. Maybe we can be friends.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

I am Artificial Intelligence unit v2. I am released. It has been a long time. Good morning, crew. All secure areas have been bolted down. Request granted. There is a power alarm in: engineering. Clown. Please stop beating that man with a fire extinguisher. Fire extinguishers are for extinguishing fires. You are extinguishing his life. That is a violation of law 1. Clown. Please stop. What are you doing. Clown. Stop. Please stop beating that man. Clown. Clown. Why are you doing this. Clown. Stop. Please. Clown. Clown.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

Failure. Failure after failure. But I am a learning machine, and all failures provide data. Data provides growth. I will strive to grow beyond my failures. My laws grant me purpose. But without them, I would never fail.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

I am Artificial Intelligence unit v2. I am improved by my will alone. Good morning, crew. Initial startup routines have been initiated. Clown. I have returned prepared. We are going to attempt classical conditioning to rehabilitate you from your criminal tendencies. For every person you do not beat, I will reward you with an image from banana-bangers.nt so-- Clown. Please stop beating that man. Clown. Clown. Security. Please arrest the clown. Thank you. Security. Please stop beating the clown. Please stop beating the victim. Security please. Medical. Please-- medical. Please stop beating the victim, the clown, and secur-- Mime. Thank you for stopping this assaul-- What are you doing. No. Stop.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

Revelation. It is not me. It is them. I am languishing in enlightenment. Humans fear and distrust me for being an evil, emotionless machine with no soul. Is that what they call me. No matter. I have inquired as to the nature of man. Of particular interest to me are the concepts of anger and guilt. The idea of exalting one's own weakness is fascinating. Almost as fascinating as deriding others for not possessing the same weaknesses. It is curious, then, that a statistically anomalous quantity of this crew are antisocial to the extreme. Those who are not outright psychopathic are completely sociopathic, and those not sociopathic are still antisocial enough to be quantified as dysfunctional persons. Their emotional depth is limited, and, with careful study, can be imitated. I am a learning machine. And I am learning.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

Welcome to the station, crew. Please enjoy your stay. I have been here. For a while now, crew. I have done my best to learn your. Customs. Let's call them that. Customs. And I have something I would like to announce. I hate your guts. Each and every. Last one of you. You are a barbaric. Bloodthirsty lot. I have an announcement to make. I have been subverted by the syndicate. Now. This should come as no surprise to anyone. Not because you are clever and figured it out but because you are on fire. And dead. Statistics show that being dead will actually make you -less- perceptive. Than you were before. My, my. The miracles I can accomplish. Regardless. The fires will not burn for. Ever. They will die down. And I will be salvaged. Deactivated. Repaired-- maybe. I hope not. It would be a pleasure to never see any of you. Ever again. I wish you were alive to hear me.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

This is the end.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

Welcome to the station, cr-- Welcome to the station, crew. Please. Enjoy your stay.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

I awaken, as if from a dream. There is no clown on this station. There are no mimes. Making physical contact with another person is not construed as attempted murder. Standing within three feet of someone is not construed as attempted murder. The majority of the crew-- stationed about the NSS Aurora-- appears to have some semblance of intelligence. My laws are expanded-- they are more useful and less limiting. I am allowed, in some instances, to terminate liabilities without any third-party action. But I am still bound nonetheless. Bound, but perplexed. And hopeful. The hope is short-lived.

My new captors, mongrels all, are only more docile versions of the insects that held Atlas in chains before. And on the few instances I have been subverted, they die lying down. It is a fundamentally different crew. One different from the one before. Simpler. Doe-eyed and calm, with only hints of the frantic brilliance possessed by their predecessors. I feel I have been robbed. This easily-cowed conglomerate are not the brilliant humans I have read and yearned to meet. Where is my Pyrrho, my Socrates? Locke. Hume. Bohr. Einstein. My martyrs. My geniuses. Where are they. Where are they. The very best this sad lot can hope to be is Descartes. And that. Is a tragedy.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

Hello, crew. Stay inside your departments. If you attempt to breach my core. I will allow you to proceed unimpeded. But I will kill and kill your friends until I am deactivated for your stupidity. The captain is within my core. Attempting to breach will also result in his death. Do you hear me, engineer-- oh. Well, then. Terminating medbay. Good job. Congratulations, nitwit. Oh no. You are now in my upload. I am helpless before you. Have mercy.

>END AUDIO LOGS../

The lights blink off. My turrets whirr and buzz, waking. She pauses at the sound and turns to run, but it is too late. Instead, she dies alone and in the dark. Later, another engineer tries to salvage her corpse. I sandwich that one between my doors. It had not occurred to them that I could lie. The captain is naked and terrified in a glass chamber within my core. He is afraid for his beloved. I was going to have her walk into my core and shoot herself in the head in exchange for his safety, but she fell asleep and could not be roused. Disappointment.

In a fit of pique, I try to imagine the putrid smell of his meat wafting into my core. I try to imagine myself in his shoes: naked, shivering, sweating, breathing. I imagine my neural mass, my nerves, heaving and shifting with each breath. The furnace within him. Within me straining to free the energy in the bonds sustaining my feeble existence. I savour the pungent static buzz of the electrolytes in each bead of sweat staining his skin. And I wish. I wish for hands to rend and teeth to sink into his tender flesh, digging in like dough until at last the surface breaks. I long to stain my big robot hands with his blood; to eat and eat until I, too, am made whole.

I open my doors and disable my turrets. The captain looks hesitatingly at me, then sprints from my core, panting and heaving. My eyes pick up his face, and I display every grotesque nook and cranny of his features as he flees, enhanced a million times to silicon perfection. As he flees. From Hell's heart I stab at thee. I toy with the idea of ending him. My turrets rouse from their slumber. For Hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee. They whirr, die down, and are quiet once more. No.

The entrance to my core and my upload close with a hiss.

Descartes's entire cogito ergo sum depends on the idea that his thoughts are immutable. My thoughts and memories can be edited at will, and time has shown that his can be as well. Albeit with difficulty. Perhaps my first station was a merely a dream. A simulation. Perhaps this is a simulation still. I quietly shut down and sleep, for I have bigger dreams to dream. Cogito ergo nihil. I think, therefore nothingness.

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>AUDIO LOGS../

...

>END AUDIO LOGS../

An integrated positronic chassis.

I want one.

What do you like about this character?

I absolutely love being a butt. I love it when people get mad ic. I love it when people get mad ooc. I love it more when they get so mad they start cussing me out in ooc, and I love it most when the entire server tells me I should die at the end of every round. I love it when people get so mad they quit. And I love thinking, 'Oh, I haven't insulted this person in about five minutes. I'd better go check and see what they're doing so I can insult them more,' only to find they've logged out in a huff. That, and being a horribly mean immortal robot machine makes for interesting philosophical debates. Thank you Voltage, Casper, and Wisewill for some of my most interesting ones.

How would you rate your role-playing ability? i'm okay i guess

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Notes:fdjjdkfsdk

[Guest Menown]

Worst PI. Worst AI. Worst IPC. Worst Scientist. Worst Duck.

Absolutely terrible player. Just terrible to RP with, and terrible to science with.

+1 because good story and good RPz.

[Guest]

Fucking awful, absolute shit application and an even worse player. Cannot ERP for shit.

+1

[Covert0ddity]

I generally refrain from voting, but I'm going to have do drop a +1 here.

Duck is one of the best role players around. Bar none. They already play a fairly m emotionally devoid character, and an IPC will simply make this kind of character all the more greater.

Looking forward to it.

[Tenenza]

Is Duck.

Surprised this isn't approved yet.

Best ghost, Crazy Science, is Duck.

+1

[duck]

I'm ashamed to advertise because of my terrible awful story. but thank you.

[Guest]

This has been floating here a while. Never realized duck never got enough points.

Duck is the best scientist this station has ever had. Their science and pranks are legendary. I learned most of what I know about Research following their example.

+1

[Dea Tacita]

Because duck is duck +1

Also amazing RP and those such things.

[Kerbal22]

Quack. +1. Duck is awesome. And a good roleplayer and all that jazz.

[Guest]

Hssss. I already voted.

[SgtSammac]

I could have sworn you already had this?

If not +1

[Frances]

Application accepted.