Complaints and you

[hivefleetchicken]

Don't flame, make things personal (subjective interpretations are a-okay), or make yourself look like an idiot by having a passive aggressive fit or I'll have the thread locked, thanks.

Anyways, since I saw someone post, in the staff forums, a statement about the community of the server, it went something like this.

 

[...] the issue I currently have is the following. We often forget that this is a game we play to have fun, and not to throw complaints at each other. You can't just fix that but I thought it would be a good idea to post this.

 

I'm not asking about why you guys make complaints, because I already know. You believe your gaming experience has been ruined to the point that OOC mitigation is required. But, in my own opinion, I don't see any game-breaking statistics in a single one of the complaints we have up, but they were obviously somewhat traumatic experiences for you guys because you thought you could not deal with it on your own and admin intervention was required.

I don't know if this thread will solve anything, but let's look over something.

I see two different types of complaints currently: those for IC behavior and those for OOC behavior. OOC behavior I can understand, but I have no idea why people would complain about a petty IC occurrence. So I want to ask: what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

;(

[hivefleetchicken]

Don't flame, make things personal (subjective interpretations are a-okay), or make yourself look like an idiot by having a passive aggressive fit or I'll have the thread locked, thanks.

Anyways, since I saw someone post, in the staff forums, a statement about the community of the server, it went something like this.

 

[...] the issue I currently have is the following. We often forget that this is a game we play to have fun, and not to throw complaints at each other. You can't just fix that but I thought it would be a good idea to post this.

 

I'm not asking about why you guys make complaints, because I already know. You believe your gaming experience has been ruined to the point that OOC mitigation is required. But, in my own opinion, I don't see any game-breaking statistics in a single one of the complaints we have up, but they were obviously somewhat traumatic experiences for you guys because you thought you could not deal with it on your own and admin intervention was required.

I don't know if this thread will solve anything, but let's look over something.

I see two different types of complaints currently: those for IC behavior and those for OOC behavior. OOC behavior I can understand, but I have no idea why people would complain about a petty IC occurrence. So I want to ask: what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

;(

[Skull132]

[...] what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

Because I lost. I was outplayed. My knowledge, skills and ability to control the in-game situation was not enough to win. And, in my case, it's not even a question of, "Was RP involved?" It's literally about the fact that I lost, regardless of how it happened.

I tend to look at this game as a challenge, I am, after all, a mechanical player. And the more involved I get in trying to beat this challenge, win, the more sour the loss, as is natural. This can become especially compounded if my perceived adversary is a singular character, for example, whenever I am trying to chase down and catch an antagonist as a security officer. Even if it's a good, fair fight, I will still be begrudging for a bit.

 

Although, I usually deal with it by taking a step back, evaluating the situation, and seeing if there were any mistakes I could avoid the next time.

[Skull132]

[...] what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

Because I lost. I was outplayed. My knowledge, skills and ability to control the in-game situation was not enough to win. And, in my case, it's not even a question of, "Was RP involved?" It's literally about the fact that I lost, regardless of how it happened.

I tend to look at this game as a challenge, I am, after all, a mechanical player. And the more involved I get in trying to beat this challenge, win, the more sour the loss, as is natural. This can become especially compounded if my perceived adversary is a singular character, for example, whenever I am trying to chase down and catch an antagonist as a security officer. Even if it's a good, fair fight, I will still be begrudging for a bit.

 

Although, I usually deal with it by taking a step back, evaluating the situation, and seeing if there were any mistakes I could avoid the next time.

[SierraKomodo]

what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

It might just be that my expectations of this server are too high at this point, but it's because I come to this server to RP. I'm on a heavy RP server for what's advertised on the tin. When a manifested ghost cultist runs into R&D and immediately cuts off the head of myself and everyone around me without a single word, and without my even knowing there were cultists/a threat on board (And this has happened before, and was a situation I sent an ahelp about), that's something I'd expect on a server like Paradise.

[SierraKomodo]

what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

It might just be that my expectations of this server are too high at this point, but it's because I come to this server to RP. I'm on a heavy RP server for what's advertised on the tin. When a manifested ghost cultist runs into R&D and immediately cuts off the head of myself and everyone around me without a single word, and without my even knowing there were cultists/a threat on board (And this has happened before, and was a situation I sent an ahelp about), that's something I'd expect on a server like Paradise.

[Baka]

I want to remind people:

RNG or events will never always pan out to your favour 100% of the time.

People are not going to 'god mod' for you because you feel like that your supermilitary, marine-trained sec officer should always defeat any bad, rotten, no good traitor that dares oppose him.

People are not going to feel bad for you if you cried gank, despite killed three people and managed to get killed by security for being proven to be absolutely armed and dangerous.

And the most important thing, that this is a game, and at the end of the day you have to ask yourself: Was it really that bad that it was breaking rules or am I just upset right now over how things panned out?

[Baka]

I want to remind people:

RNG or events will never always pan out to your favour 100% of the time.

People are not going to 'god mod' for you because you feel like that your supermilitary, marine-trained sec officer should always defeat any bad, rotten, no good traitor that dares oppose him.

People are not going to feel bad for you if you cried gank, despite killed three people and managed to get killed by security for being proven to be absolutely armed and dangerous.

And the most important thing, that this is a game, and at the end of the day you have to ask yourself: Was it really that bad that it was breaking rules or am I just upset right now over how things panned out?

[Tainavaa]

My reasons are explained in my complaint thread. You are cordially invited to refute me.

[Tainavaa]

My reasons are explained in my complaint thread. You are cordially invited to refute me.

[LordFowl]

I think a solid rule of thumb for making complaints is to wait a day after the event actually happens. If you still think the other player is in the wrong after a day, go for it.

Everytime I make a complaint (Which is rather rare), I typically end up regretting it a day later.

[LordFowl]

I think a solid rule of thumb for making complaints is to wait a day after the event actually happens. If you still think the other player is in the wrong after a day, go for it.

Everytime I make a complaint (Which is rather rare), I typically end up regretting it a day later.

[Guest Menown]

The way I approach complaints is to improve behavior. Showing somebody why what they did was wrong, be it ICly or OOCly seems to work much better than just punishing. I try to have my complaints be based in finding out the motivations of why whatever it was occurred, and if it is something that needs to be changed.

[Guest Menown]

The way I approach complaints is to improve behavior. Showing somebody why what they did was wrong, be it ICly or OOCly seems to work much better than just punishing. I try to have my complaints be based in finding out the motivations of why whatever it was occurred, and if it is something that needs to be changed.

[Guest]

[...] what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

Because I lost. I was outplayed. My knowledge, skills and ability to control the in-game situation was not enough to win. And, in my case, it's not even a question of, "Was RP involved?" It's literally about the fact that I lost, regardless of how it happened.

I tend to look at this game as a challenge, I am, after all, a mechanical player. And the more involved I get in trying to beat this challenge, win, the more sour the loss, as is natural. This can become especially compounded if my perceived adversary is a singular character, for example, whenever I am trying to chase down and catch an antagonist as a security officer. Even if it's a good, fair fight, I will still be begrudging for a bit.

 

Although, I usually deal with it by taking a step back, evaluating the situation, and seeing if there were any mistakes I could avoid the next time.

 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JAZszldt4T5fUFoki7JJdpVmsiuX40VYSSXIaiFDSAM/edit

[Guest]

[...] what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

Because I lost. I was outplayed. My knowledge, skills and ability to control the in-game situation was not enough to win. And, in my case, it's not even a question of, "Was RP involved?" It's literally about the fact that I lost, regardless of how it happened.

I tend to look at this game as a challenge, I am, after all, a mechanical player. And the more involved I get in trying to beat this challenge, win, the more sour the loss, as is natural. This can become especially compounded if my perceived adversary is a singular character, for example, whenever I am trying to chase down and catch an antagonist as a security officer. Even if it's a good, fair fight, I will still be begrudging for a bit.

 

Although, I usually deal with it by taking a step back, evaluating the situation, and seeing if there were any mistakes I could avoid the next time.

 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JAZszldt4T5fUFoki7JJdpVmsiuX40VYSSXIaiFDSAM/edit

[Skull132]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JAZszldt4T5fUFoki7JJdpVmsiuX40VYSSXIaiFDSAM/edit

 

I think you missed the underlying point: It's fine. Feeling sour over a loss is completely normal, and completely natural (obviously within certain bounds). The actual question is: how does one deal with it? Some people deal with it by scrutinizing the adversary, and then trying to sate themselves with that (by posting a complaint).

My own mechanism for dealing with shenanigans like that is to simply stop, go do something else a little, maybe brood (which is better than just spawning a grin on your face and telling yourself that everything's fine and dandy -- in the grander scheme, if you keep bottling up anger, it will start slowly breaking you, and chipping away at your capacity to deal with anger in the future), then see how I could do better in the future and come back to enjoying the game.

[Skull132]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JAZszldt4T5fUFoki7JJdpVmsiuX40VYSSXIaiFDSAM/edit

 

I think you missed the underlying point: It's fine. Feeling sour over a loss is completely normal, and completely natural (obviously within certain bounds). The actual question is: how does one deal with it? Some people deal with it by scrutinizing the adversary, and then trying to sate themselves with that (by posting a complaint).

My own mechanism for dealing with shenanigans like that is to simply stop, go do something else a little, maybe brood (which is better than just spawning a grin on your face and telling yourself that everything's fine and dandy -- in the grander scheme, if you keep bottling up anger, it will start slowly breaking you, and chipping away at your capacity to deal with anger in the future), then see how I could do better in the future and come back to enjoying the game.

[Guest]

I'm not sure if you're trying extremely hard to give people mixed feelings here, but attempting to rationalize why people act like the way they do and acting like an armchair psychologist doesn't actually address the problem that comes with people who are extremely steamed making a player complaint right off the bat and stirring up a shitstorm and ending up turning the staff and everyone else against them because their attitude is outright ridiculous.

It is actually not okay to be upset when it comes to the detriment of others. I'm surprised we don't have a 'leave your emotional baggage at the door' community guideline already, I've been a part of maybe five to six and I've seen people get permabanned from the forums for starting drama and masquerading as victims.

Granted, it truly is amusing when a certain someone gets laughed out of a community for faking cancer and causing all sorts of ridiculous emotional melodrama since internet justice is purely juicy to watch unfold... But it's not something you want to see on a regular basis.

Everyone has their own personal problems. It's their decision whether or not to drop their baggage someplace else or let it bog them down and weaken them. I expect that there will be consequences for those that express their emotional instability in inappropriate fashions.

Telling someone 'it's going to be okay' when they clearly are not in the right mindset to be cool and collected as you make yourself out to be is more than likely going to throw them off even more. I've tried and failed with this so many times, and lying to people has gotten tiring.

Asking how you can help someone is a much better solution, because it shows you actually give enough of a damn about the person and you don't have some empty filler phrase intended to make them shut up. There are plenty of conversational/emotional tells that show when someone needs help screwing their head back on and chilling out.

Your coping mechanism is not bound to help many people. It is your way of doing things, and everyone is different, and so they will do things differently.

[Guest]

I'm not sure if you're trying extremely hard to give people mixed feelings here, but attempting to rationalize why people act like the way they do and acting like an armchair psychologist doesn't actually address the problem that comes with people who are extremely steamed making a player complaint right off the bat and stirring up a shitstorm and ending up turning the staff and everyone else against them because their attitude is outright ridiculous.

It is actually not okay to be upset when it comes to the detriment of others. I'm surprised we don't have a 'leave your emotional baggage at the door' community guideline already, I've been a part of maybe five to six and I've seen people get permabanned from the forums for starting drama and masquerading as victims.

Granted, it truly is amusing when a certain someone gets laughed out of a community for faking cancer and causing all sorts of ridiculous emotional melodrama since internet justice is purely juicy to watch unfold... But it's not something you want to see on a regular basis.

Everyone has their own personal problems. It's their decision whether or not to drop their baggage someplace else or let it bog them down and weaken them. I expect that there will be consequences for those that express their emotional instability in inappropriate fashions.

Telling someone 'it's going to be okay' when they clearly are not in the right mindset to be cool and collected as you make yourself out to be is more than likely going to throw them off even more. I've tried and failed with this so many times, and lying to people has gotten tiring.

Asking how you can help someone is a much better solution, because it shows you actually give enough of a damn about the person and you don't have some empty filler phrase intended to make them shut up. There are plenty of conversational/emotional tells that show when someone needs help screwing their head back on and chilling out.

Your coping mechanism is not bound to help many people. It is your way of doing things, and everyone is different, and so they will do things differently.

[Skull132]

Yes, but the first step to dealing with a problem is admitting to it. Hence my admittance of the truth, the reason why I feel annoyed, angry, when I die. As corny and as cliche as it sounds, it is correct. Once you admit what's going on, and you see it, you are able to keep track of it. Once you're able to keep track of it, you're able to control it. And once you're able to control it, you're able to deal with it properly.

Also, please don't build a strawman off of my arguments. They're a little too easy to burn. My point, perhaps unfinished, I'll grant you that, is that feeling angry when you're defeated in any game is fine. It happens. You just need to be aware of it, as I explained above, for the reason that I explained above.

How you deal with it properly, yes, that's your own business.

And, pardon my self-centered-ness. My way is the only one with which I am intimately familiar with. As such, it is the only answer I can provide outright and explain the mechanics of, instead of putting my thoughts and presumptions into someone else's head. If it helps people, then great. If it doesn't work for them, then so be it. Hopefully they can find something else.

EDIT: Actually, fuck that, I have nothing to apologize for. Read the question again, will you?

 

what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

The question was personal. I answered from the key required.

Edited September 16, 2015 by Guest

[Skull132]

Yes, but the first step to dealing with a problem is admitting to it. Hence my admittance of the truth, the reason why I feel annoyed, angry, when I die. As corny and as cliche as it sounds, it is correct. Once you admit what's going on, and you see it, you are able to keep track of it. Once you're able to keep track of it, you're able to control it. And once you're able to control it, you're able to deal with it properly.

Also, please don't build a strawman off of my arguments. They're a little too easy to burn. My point, perhaps unfinished, I'll grant you that, is that feeling angry when you're defeated in any game is fine. It happens. You just need to be aware of it, as I explained above, for the reason that I explained above.

How you deal with it properly, yes, that's your own business.

And, pardon my self-centered-ness. My way is the only one with which I am intimately familiar with. As such, it is the only answer I can provide outright and explain the mechanics of, instead of putting my thoughts and presumptions into someone else's head. If it helps people, then great. If it doesn't work for them, then so be it. Hopefully they can find something else.

EDIT: Actually, fuck that, I have nothing to apologize for. Read the question again, will you?

 

what about dying/getting killed without RP pisses you off? Not just to the complaint owners right now, but to everyone who really gets their gears grinder when they see that stuff. What about death makes you so uptight and vindictive?

 

The question was personal. I answered from the key required.

Edited September 16, 2015 by Guest

[hivefleetchicken]

I literally cannot let Delta into a thread without him throwing a 'butthurt' statement against someone who was completely civilized.

Do I have to ask for staff to lock this? Or can we, FOR ONCE, not make things personal?

[hivefleetchicken]

I literally cannot let Delta into a thread without him throwing a 'butthurt' statement against someone who was completely civilized.

Do I have to ask for staff to lock this? Or can we, FOR ONCE, not make things personal?

[Guest Marlon Phoenix]

I get my pantaloons rather distraught over 'losing', but after a few minutes I get over it. I only really complain in complaints when I don't think there's any good intention behind the behaviour. Being ganked just makes me immediately go "WELL POOPOO PANCAKES I JUST LOST" but if there was some form of rhyme and reason to it, it's completely fine.