[Denied]Tomiix's Tajara Application

[Tomiix]

BYOND Key:TomiixStarslasher

Character Names:Azala Huz'kai, Jedark Korpar, Sir Ver

Species you are applying to play:Tajara

What color do you plan on making your first alien character (Dionaea & IPCs exempt):Wheat

Have you read our lore section's page on this species?:Yes in deedy

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Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question

Why do you wish to play this specific race:

I want to join Faysal's harem.

Hm... let me try again...

I want to be a fur faggot in game.

Dammit, that won't work either...

To be honest, I do like the design of the Tajarans first and foremost. The Tajaran conflict is less interesting to me then the mannerisms that they have. Tajaran culture and they way they behave and the way that their culture formed is more interesting to me. The way that there is clear racism in their society... but the racism isn't superficial. Each ethnicity in Tajaran culture do have clearly breed differences. Sure, these differences don't make them worth more than one another morally wise, but character wise? Their interactions with each other and how they value each other based on race, and the fact that they base their assumptions and how they treat people on more than mere stereotypes is interesting to me. I am also intrigued by the NKA the most, and would like to eventually make a character that explores that facet of Tajaran life more.

Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: The most obvious difference is that Tajaran have different social norms than humans do. Especially their emphasis on avoiding nouns that seem to personal, like you and me. Preferring to refer to each other as him and her. While maybe not intended but certainly as a result this wildly shapes how they look at gender as well. Besides this obvious surface detail, they also are heavily impacted by the sudden appearance of an advanced civilization on their lives. The Tajaran people and their land is viewed widely as a resource to be used while they are weakened in their own civil war. Nanotrasen has been able to get away with inserting itself into Tajaran life, and is impacting the outcome of this species. Therefore, they are certainly not as culturally advanced as humanity, and are much more traditional. Also coming from a time of feudalistic oppression, they are certainly more rebellious than Unathi are. A species I am used to playing.

 

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Character Name: Luka Abdul-Jarih

Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs

Luka Abdul-Jarih was born to a common M'sai family in the city of B'urr who practiced in medicine. His parents ran a small family pharmacy and had expected Luka to follow in their steps, until his call for war came from the PRA. Luka began his medical training through the PRA, and became a field medic in the PRA's army. Luka aborhed violence, and was not very highly rated during his training. However due to his medical abilities and his higher ratings in stealth and team focused activities, at the end of his boot camp period he was put in a squad of fellow M'sai Tajara. They would fight in his own back yard, on the border between B'urr and Tampiska. During his special training with this squad he picked up Nal'rasan, as they were to be deployed on sabotage missions behind enemy lines. During these missions, Luka hardly ever fired a shot. When he did, it was usually ineffective. As far as the team he was with were aware, he only has one confirmed kill, and the kill occurred more so by accident, when he had fallen over and misfired his rifle during a skirmish, landing a lucky shot on one of the ALA they were ambushing. During one of these such missions, Luka's squad was caught off guard by a patrol that wasn't observed during original scouting reports. During the impending chaos, both sides suffered heavy casualties. When all of his squad were either dead or unconscious, Luka waved for surrender. After just nearly surviving reflective shots, Luka was captured. He explained to his mostly Hharar capturers that he was a medic, and wanted to help his comrades. Agreeing to tend to their wounds as well if he be allowed to do so. After negotiations to focus on the Hharar captors first, despite one of his comrades having a time sensitive fatal injury. Luka was able to save two of his squad mates out of the four others, and the three of them were escorted to a ALA camp in the mountains. Only about thirty miles from his home.

During Luka's time as a ALA prisoner of war, he was subjected to all kinds of interrogation tactics and torture. During the times he wasn't imprisoned or being tortured he was forced to work in an ALA mash unit to treat injured ALA rebels. Luka also treated PRA prisoners secretly with supplies he smuggled out of the MASH supply tents. During his time imprisoned, he took an oath similar to the hippocratic oath, seeing during his reflection and time the unfairness of the war, and the hypocrisy of the leaders of both sides. He tried to explain his thinking to the others, but most of his comrades figured he had fallen for ALA propaganda, and mistrusted him. During one of his times in the MASH hospital, Luka met another M'sai, an ALA soldier who was taking particular interest in him. Luka caught quite a few of his opportunistic glances from the soldier, and signaled him in Nal'rasan a homosexual friendly code phrase, at risk of taking abuse. However, he was pleasantly surprised when a similar message was returned. The two rendezvous after the soldier was treated, and after a friendly exchange about their plight, the ALA soldier agreed to sneak out Luka after experiencing how kind he was. Luka wasn't particularly interested in the soldier, but was desperate to leave. That night Luka was smuggled out in the back of a truck, and taken home. After an exchange of affection with the ALA rebel, Luka returned to the PRA army as an escaped prisoner of war. Seeing as if he stayed at home he would of been considered a deserter. Luka served the rest of his term with an PRA MASH unit, and then was offered the opportunity to work with Nanotrasen. Luka decided personally that he wanted off of Adhomai, and wanted the chance to experience a life where he could be free to be himself. To be away from the wartorn Adhomai, and the expectations of home.

Luka selected the name Luka Abdul-Jarih, as Luka was a simplified version of his birth Tajaran name, and Abdul-Jarih meant 'servant of the wounded' in arabic. He proudly carried his title, as he planned to care for all creeds and races. During further medical training in human space Luka picked up several nicknames. Including 'Luke, Lucas, Vanilla, and Milkshake', he is very floaty when it comes to nicknames, and allows people to call him anything as long as he finds it cute. He is finishing his paramedic and EMT training, and is assigned as a medical assistant on board the Aurora to gauge his compatibility with the station.

What do you like about this character? Luka is very similar to my Unathi character Azala Huz'kai. He is very light hearted to compete with the harshness he has had in the past. Like with my Unathi whitelist, I apply with what I am going to play as. I understand Luka is less conservative than most would want out of a traditional Tajaran whitelist, but I hope this application proves that I understand the species enough to play them. Luka fills a void in what I play right now. He is very carefree, flamboyant, and more outgoing than Azala. He is certainly less uptight than my command character as well. He is in a role that will allow him to go around the station and be a socialite, while also fulfill the job that he wants to do so badly. Something I have been craving to do recently is interact more with the crew and have a reason to move around it more, hopefully Luka provides that and I get to experience more interesting interactions.

How would you rate your role-playing ability? I tend to be overtly modest, I think I am alright. While I do not put insane effort in, like having emotes binded or what have you, I do put lots of thought into my characters and what I say, and strive to have a joint fun experience. However I have quite a few people who like to sing my praises much more than me, and I hope they don't make me look foolish my showing up.

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Notes: This app took me awhile because of real life issues and making sure I applied with a character that I actually wanted to play, and I think Luka is one I definitely want to play for sure.

Edited January 8, 2018 by Guest

[Fire and Glory]

Character Names:Azala Huz'kai, Jedark Korpar, Sir Ver

I do not interact with these characters and I find Tomiix somewhat annoying OOCly so we will judge the app on its own.

 

Why do you wish to play this specific race:...

This is alright, except you misspelled 'than' at the start.

 

Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: ...While maybe not intended but certainly as a result this wildly shapes how they look at gender as well...

I do not see how to be honest.

they are certainly more rebellious than Unathi are. A species I am used to playing.

Try not to overdo the rebellious thing. Anyways the rest of this is fine.

 

During his time imprisoned, he took the hippocratic oath,

This kind of rubs me wrong because the Hippocratic oath is a human invention, it's sort of fine because he might've seen it on the internet or something but personally I would've said he swore an oath to himself to ease suffering or such.

I am a bit mystified as to what NPA stands for but it probably makes sense.

Now, I am reminded of a snippet I read on the internet, which is always correct, that said that doctors tend to experience heightened amounts of stress compared to other professions. Add that onto being literally tortured as a Prisoner of War after the stresses of combat and I am a bit surprised that he's not a complete wreck, or at least somewhere below being just peachy fine, but whatever. Maybe he got rock solid mental training in that special training of his, maybe you're one of those people who leaves stuff out and he actually is a wreck trying to keep a happy facade, or maybe he's some sort of masochist. PTSD isn't my thing so I won't push this too much.

Overall the application seems okay. The backstory hits the notes of start, middle and end correctly, and I will tentatively endorse this.

 

a common M'sai family in the city of B'urr

In my day we called it P'urr, dammit. How the lore has fallen.

 

cutsey

*vomit

[Tomiix]

His facade is definitely overcompensation for the torture. While at the same time being away from the war is like itself a sort of therapy. If you lived on a wartorn planet and lived on a border city where the threat of raids and fire near you where high and often and then suddenly you were put in an environment that is just safe, like a human school. A lot of tension is relieved, explaining his main motivation at leaving. Not being expected to rejoin the war, or having to be affected by it.

I also personally hate PTSD as it is used too often as an excuse to self antag, however if forced in a combat situation or if forced by someone too similar looking to a captor he might break down and cry. In general I will not be looking to PTSD roleplay as a justification to shit on somebody.

[Guest Marlon Phoenix]

I don't think characters impacted by past trauma should always be walking pity parades. People react to trauma differently. In medical specifically there's a lot of gallows humor and dark comedy, and when there are interviews with first responders to major disasters they always try to keep on a good mood. I think their optimistic demenor is a breath of fresh air in regards to dealing with a bad history.

 

Gallows humor is not a feel-good, Patch Adams kind of humor, but it is not synonymous with all cruel humor, either. As one physician put it, the difference between gallows humor and derogatory humor is like "the difference between whistling as you go through the graveyard and kicking over the gravestones."

https://meded.duke.edu/practice/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Gallows-humor-in-medicine.pdf

On the other hand, referring to the character as 'cutsie' makes them come off as incredibly infantile. This is a grown man and a medical professional. Playing him as a cutie patootie is not ideal and it will raise a lot of red flags when comrade Mofo comes to this application.

[Tomiix]

The intention was not to make him infantile seeming. He is a repressed homosexual and outgoing, flamboyant personality and it may show by him being a bit... over done in some cases. He likes being 'cute' as in that he likes being feminine, and identifies more with females.

I'll adjust the submission to reflect this more accurately.

[Fire and Glory]

I don't think characters impacted by past trauma should always be walking pity parades. People react to trauma differently. In medical specifically there's a lot of gallows humor and dark comedy, and when there are interviews with first responders to major disasters they always try to keep on a good mood. I think their optimistic demenor is a breath of fresh air in regards to dealing with a bad history.

I was generally referring to the fact that the rest of the application seemed to have completely glossed over any lasting effects, but anyway, so long as Tomiix acknowledges that the scars are there, which they have, I do not have any issues with this application.

[Guest Menown]

The intention was not to make him infantile seeming. He is a repressed homosexual and outgoing, flamboyant personality and it may show by him being a bit... over done in some cases. He likes being 'cute' as in that he likes being feminine, and identifies more with females.

I'll adjust the submission to reflect this more accurately.

 

Being a repressed homosexual yet flamboyant and feminine, with attributes that you've described as him identifying with females and being cute. I don't think you understand what the word repressed means.

It's possible to make a homosexual character without them being flamboyant, or feminine. If you want to play a girl, just play a girl, but playing what's likely to be a borderline trap is asking for trouble, especially considering Tajara society takes a grim look on the homosexuals and transgender population.

[Tomiix]

He was repressed up until the point he found himself surrounded by species that couldn't give a shit. Leading to him feeling more comfortable with himself.

I do not mind the fact that he will have issues with some of the crew. I thought I made it clear my understanding that the Tajara population as large doesn't approve through the fact that I said he was repressed, and that he had to use secret handsigns known by closet homosexuals that allow them to greet each other secretly. (Reminisant of work arounds human homosexuals had to do historically)

This is the character I want to play with, and I am aware of the conflicts he would create with his fellows.

[Scheveningen]

Why do you wish to play this specific race:

I want to join Faysal's harem.

Hm... let me try again...

I want to be a fur faggot in game.

Dammit, that won't work either...

 

Whether joking or not this is a terrible way to start off an application. It is not something appropriate that anyone would write given the already controversial stigma Tajaran applications face due to the past reputation of the species on Aurora. It already raises a red flag right there regardless of sincerity.

Sexual repression is, quite literally, a state in which an individual feels they cannot express their own sexuality due to social conditions or internal psychological struggles that are ongoing. To be sexually repressed implicitly states your character seems, appears and otherwise is heteronormative to outsiders.

In case you didn't see, I believe Mofo recently denied an application with another feminine homosexual catboy medical department character. The example I'm citing is morein rather extreme compared to what is being described in the OP here, but it somewhat defeats the point to have an openly homosexual Tajaran character concept from a background where homosexuality is not only frowned upon but intervened upon in regards to the slightest suspicion that a Tajaran expresses homosexual tendencies.

I detest character designs that only make the homosexuality a larger focus than any other attribute of the character as it makes a bigoted implication that sexuality is the only thing that matters or should matter, whether it is your intention or not. It is a sickening level of objectification that sets back any progress for LGBQT members to simply want to be accepted as being normal as anyone else is. The common stereotype for any trans/gay character on this server has always been played off as an effeminate flamboyant tart and this trend is honestly disgusting.

Not supporting this application until some real work has been done to make this a more believable character. Hive and Sue did not make a reformation to Tajaran views on homosexuality just for nothing, they did it to create quality control on Tajaran characters whether they were already gay or not. The tension makes it far more interesting for players to roleplay Tajaran characters because they legitimately need to respect the oppressive authoritarianism that their nation has affected the Tajaran people with, and RP accordingly.

A characters sexuality should never come before other meaningful character attributes because otherwise you are playing nothing other than a walking stereotype of a sex object. That is nothing short of offensive.

 

and that he had to use secret handsigns known by closet homosexuals that allow them to greet each other secretly. (Reminisant of work arounds human homosexuals had to do historically)

 

This stereotype barely gets near to being true to the reality of LGBTQ experiences and I don't know a single person that has ever done this short of extremely sexually active homosexual friends I know. Handkerchief/hand-signalling code is fetishist BDSM shit and not representative of normal LGBTQ behavior, and it's even been said that this social phenomenon was purposefully created by an ideologically hostile party to give the LGBTQ community a false reputation as fetishists. I'm seriously stunned.

[Mofo1995]

I will be reviewing this application tomorrow.

[Mofo1995]

So, first off I'd like to say that the application is well-written, in that you have a firm grasp of the art of storytelling.

Second off, I didn't see what the application looked like before it was edited, so I dunno where all this seems to be blowing out of proportion. The homosexuality part seems grafted onto the end... ish. I'll get into that. As someone who isn't gay, and isn't in tune with LGBTQIA+ rights movements, let's limit the scope of this discussion as much as possible to our fantastical science fiction setting instead of talking about OOC politics regarding it- a restriction which I feel inhibits proper expansion of alien races in lore.

Taking it from the top, plenty of people put jokes in these sections just because they're such a formality, no need to make a big stink about it, fellas, considering our boy here went on to satisfactorily answer the questions when the jolly good fun was over. While I've always complained about everyone seeming to ignore focus on race considering how much support for it there has been in the lore, I've been pleasantly surprised at how newer applicats have been zooming and enhancing on that jon. I think it's reflective of the enhanced maturity of the current crop of Tajara players on station who are willing to broach those subjects and express racial unrest on station supported with good roleplay. The focus on the social elements making Tajara different rather than spitting out a paraphrase for the wiki's description of their cosmetic and physical differences was also pleasant, since the latter tends to indicate a reader is uninterested, a furry, or a power gamer. About the only thing I disagree with is the notion that they are not as culturally advanced, in that I do not view culture as an object of progression and regression. Authoritative statements which evaluate and weigh cultures against each other is inherently bad for anthropology. One of the themes I've been really hoping that people would grasp within the lore lies with the grappling between moral imperialism and tolerant multiculturalism.

Okay, let's get on to backstory. So firstly the call of war brought our Luka, with pre-adulthood backstory short and sparse, into the Republican Army despite abhorring violence. This seems to imply that he was brought in within the past 2 years, since conscription for the Republican Army was only brought into law two years ago. It was a few months after conscription was passed into law that a mostly conscript army seized P'urr, which had been in ALA hands, and renamed it B'urr. What I'm trying to evaluate here is Luka's age, since he would have been born before the second revolution, and his home city would have been the site of at least two major battles in his young adulthood, once sometime after 2451 and a second time in 2458. I guess I just want to know how the family pharmacy was doing during all of this and how he wound up in the military despite being a pacifist in nature.

I appreciate the take on a service record being generally unheroic, but he sounds liable to be absolutely *hated* by all his comrades. But, there really is a phenomena of people purposely avoiding shooting to kill. Studies which will go uncited as the only one I can remember of the top of my head was a LindyBeige video strongly suggest that most soldiers just kind of shot in the direction of their enemies in the hopes of scaring them into running away. An English regiment in testing was found to be absurdly more accurate when firing at white sheets organized and placed at a distance to imitate line infantry than they were at actual line infantry, suggesting most were intentionally missing in combat. So I guess there's a pass and justifiable reason there. Back to story, it's not entirely clear when this is all happening still. Prior to 2458 the ALA controlled both P'urr and Tampiska, so fighting between them seems like forming a salient and asking to be pincered. It seems to suggest a scenario in which the PRA owns P'urr and the ALA owns Tampiska, which makes me think it happened within the past 2 in-game years.

It's during Luka's time of servitude that I really start to get lost on the backstory though. So he spends time in the prison camp, taking on the usual war crimes, when he's acting as slave medic and decides he wants to help people in medical need no matter what and do no harm. Or something similar to it. Okay, fine. But... preaching to PRA POWs that both sides are hypocrites and not worth following? What'd the PRA do to him? It's not really clear here how the PRA wronged him on par with being a work camped POW, all that's defined of what they've done so far was being unhappy with him for low combat capability. Personally, I'd think he bought into ALA propaganda too if I were one of his comrades. But then we get to the part of the application where I just really don't buy it. Homosexuality isn't really native to Tajara, in that it was universally unacceptable before contact with humanity. Gay rights and being a part of humanity's sphere of influence goes hand in hand with Tajaran perception in this world where there just weren't really any homosexuals who hadn't completely repressed their true selves. The ALA which started as a coup has grown to a reactionary popular movement. Homosexuality faces worse discrimination there than anywhere else on Adhomai, and it's by popular decision. So this weird... covert homosexual gang signs in the prison camp between a reactionary soldier fighting for popular traditional values and the bleeding heart centrist pacifistic just doesn't really seem all that believable. But, the ALA does press people into service, so maybe this mystery soldier doesn't give a Njarir's ass about popular ideology. But there's still the issue that he risked execution for desertion and treason to sneak a doctor out, the very one that was and would be treating him and his comrades if they got hurt, just for a one night stand. I dunno, as a plot point, having to sleep his way out of the camp seems forced and clumsy. Am I supposed to get from this that Luka is the kind to use others (possibly fatally) for his own ends, in an act which is hypocritical of his knock off Hippocratic oath? Am I supposed to get that this one soldier was very feckless and horny to the point of being suicidal? What did it bring to the table that some other hardship as a means of escape didn't?

 

'servant of the wounded' in arabic. He proudly carried his title, as he planned to care for all creeds and races. During further medical training in human space Luka picked up several nicknames. Including 'Luke, Lucas, Vanilla, and Milkshake', he is very floaty when it comes to nicknames, and allows people to call him anything as long as he finds it cute. He is finishing his paramedic and EMT training, and is assigned as a medical assistant on board the Aurora to gauge his compatibility with the station.

 

OwO what's this?

Anyways, it's clear that you're a capable and competent writer and that you're interested in Tajara lore, but while this application catches some of the general vibes, it tends to get hung up and tangled on the point of being believable. Namely, I feel like it shifts focus too much on what makes Luka different from other Tajara, rather than giving him much of anything tying him to Tajara.

Application Denied.