FreshRefreshments Posted June 9, 2018 Share Posted June 9, 2018 (edited) BYOND Key: FreshRefreshments Character Names: Erin MacGregor, Jerome Keyes, Bonnabelle Spakes, Cletus Holloway, Sydney Markhill Species you are applying to play: Tajaran, Zhan-Khazan to be exact What color do you plan on making your first alien character (Dionaea & IPCs exempt): Blue-Grey Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: Yes I have. Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question Why do you wish to play this specific race: Because Tajaran are interesting! They have a culture that is heavily impacted by revolutions and nobility, and they are separated into various ethnicities that are built for different things. However, after further delving into their lore, I got into the idea of creating a character working with it. The mroe in depth I get into a races lore, the more I want to put a character into action. Although it takes time to fully get into Tajaran lore and figure out a way to implement yourself, that just makes the pay off of (hopefully, anyway) creating a character that other people enjoy reacting with, and I enjoy playing. Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: Mechanically, they are resistant to cold, but not to heat. They cannot wear gloves without specially modifying them to fit their clawed hands, and same thing with boots. They also roll their r's and speak with "her" rather than "me" (In this case, at least). Socially, Tajarans arent too liberal, and tend to have a bit of racism between the ethnicities. They also recently have had 2 revolutions, one still in progress, meaning war is no foreign subject to them. They can also either look up to NT as a sort of savior, or dissaprove of their meddling with Adhomai affairs and blame them for causing only more problems. Character Name: Mer'tala Kaemah Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs Born in the year 2436 to two Zhan-Khazan parents, Mer'tala had never known the fighting that had come from the First Revolution, and instead only knew of its effects. She lived in People's Republic territory, and although her parents obviously resented the war greatly, she learned from them that they had been on the side of the rebels. Being born after the revolution, she was able to get an education, though she didnt excel. As she grew up, her boisterous personality and love of camaraderie drew in friends, and she certainly never felt lonely. She made sure to constantly keep herself in physical shape, as she didnt see herself getting a high skill level job. When Mer'tala was 15 and Rhagrrhuzau Hadii was assassinated, once she understood the entirety of the context it meant, she was conflicted. The death of their leader was sad, but the effects it had were certainly helpful to the Tajara as a whole; Rhagrrhuzau's brother actually stood by the promise with NT. Her inner conflict quickly found a side when the Adhomai Liberation Army was formed, and she was frustrated that people had decided that civil war was the best way to fix this. She had considered herself very lucky that the First Revolution had stopped before she was born, and was very disappointed to hear that it had started up again. Although her parents felt a constant connection to her blood ties were important, so was the life of their daughter. They scraped together enough money for the next shuttle to Biesel, and after a very hesitant, and drawn out goodbye, she set out, being 21 at the time. She worked in Biesel, in Mendell City, specifically District 10 for a few years, before getting a desire to get and seek out, a job at NanoTransen, out of admiration for how they have helped Adhomai in the past. Her physical strength and ripe young age of 24 made it fairly easy to land a low skill level job, like the Cargo Bay. What do you like about this character? I enjoy her personality. She cares more for the safety of everyone, and will sacrifice her own if it means making a larger number of people safe. She likes having a large group of people around, and enjoys entertaining and making others feel good. How would you rate your role-playing ability? I'd say a 7/10, but in reality its probably more of a 6.5/10. I have RPed for a while, but I make mistakes sometimes. Not perfect, by any means. Notes: This is my first crack at making a Tajaran, so please, any feedback is appreciated! Edited June 11, 2018 by Guest Link to comment
Doxxmedearly Posted June 10, 2018 Share Posted June 10, 2018 -1 bc you'll play Erin less and that would make me sad. But, in all seriousness... Your RP abilities are... awesome. What is this 7/10 bs? You're at least a 9. You keep consistent characters, you don't powergame, you do fear and pain RP, you're the only one really trying to rile people up on Rev rounds... I would trust you wholeheartedly with a whitelist. For that alone, you have a huge, huge +1 from me. As far as the character... I don't know a ton of Tajaran lore. I... don't know what job is says she'll be in? Did you have an idea or was that left out or am I missing it? She seems good otherwise, I sense the basics of her personality. As far as the story... that's on the lore devs. Seems fine to me. Link to comment
tbear13 Posted June 10, 2018 Share Posted June 10, 2018 I'm gonna write feedback. Gonna hold off on a +1 or -1 for now, though. BYOND Key: FreshRefreshments Character Names: Erin MacGregor, Jerome Keyes, Bonnabelle Spakes, Cletus Holloway, Sydney Markhill Species you are applying to play: Tajaran, Zhan-Khazan to be exact What color do you plan on making your first alien character (Dionaea & IPCs exempt): Blue-Grey Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: Yes I have. Looks about right. I've seen Erin around a time or two, but I've never interacted with you outside of that. Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question Why do you wish to play this specific race: Because Tajaran are interesting! They have a culture that is heavily impacted by revolutions and nobility, and they are separated into various ethnicities that are built for different things. However, after further delving into their lore, I got into the idea of creating a character working with it. The mroe in depth I get into a races lore, the more I want to put a character into action. Although it takes time to fully get into Tajaran lore and figure out a way to implement yourself, that just makes the pay off of (hopefully, anyway) creating a character that other people enjoy reacting with, and I enjoy playing. I'm not quite sure what you mean by it taking time to get into the lore, but I have no major complaints about the answer. Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: Mechanically, they are resistant to cold, but not to heat. They cannot wear gloves without specially modifying them to fit their clawed hands, and same thing with boots. They also roll their r's and speak with "her" rather than "me" (In this case, at least). Socially, Tajarans arent too liberal, and tend to have a bit of racism between the ethnicities. They also recently have had 2 revolutions, one still in progress, meaning war is no foreign subject to them. They can also either look up to NT as a sort of savior, or dissaprove of their meddling with Adhomai affairs and blame them for causing only more problems. This is a good answer. Character Name: Mer'tala Kaemah Please provide a short backstory for this character, approximately 2 paragraphs Born in the year 2436 to two Zhan-Khazan parents, Mer'tala had never known the fighting that had come from the First Revolution, and instead only knew of its effects. She lived in People's Republic territory, and although her parents obviously resented the war greatly, she learned from them that they had been on the side of the rebels. Being born after the revolution, she was able to get an education, though she didnt excel. As she grew up, her boisterous personality and love of camaraderie drew in friends, and she certainly never felt lonely. She made sure to constantly keep herself in physical shape, as she didnt see herself getting a high skill level job. Normal kitty childhood, meow! When Rhagrrhuzau Hadii was assassinated, once she understood the entirety of the context it meant, she was conflicted. The death of their leader was sad, but the effects it had were certainly helpful to the Tajara as a whole. Her inner conflict quickly found a side when the Adhomai Liberation Army was formed, and she yearned for the fighting to stop. She had considered herself very lucky that the fighting had stopped before she was born, and was very disappointed to hear that it had started up again. Although her parents felt a constant connection to her blood ties were important, so was the life of their daughter. They scraped together enough money for the next shuttle to Biesel, and after a very hesitant, and drawn out goodbye, she set out, being 17 at the time. She worked in Biesel, in Mendell City, specifically District 10, before getting a desire to get and seek out, a job at NanoTransen, out of admiration for how they have helped Adhomai in the past. So, there're a few issues with this paragraph here, in my opinion. For starters, why did she think Long-Name Hadii being assassinated could be helpful? What made her support the ALA? It seems odd that she would admire NT as well, given her support for the ALA. I feel like her backstory was made to skirt around the major Tajaran plot-point. The war starts, then she's gone. She didn't endure any of the stuff that make Taj unique, y'know? PS: What job is she gonna have? What do you like about this character? I enjoy her personality. She cares more for the safety of everyone, and will sacrifice her own if it means making a larger number of people safe. She likes having a large group of people around, and enjoys entertaining and making others feel good. In terms of the selflessness, how far is she gonna take that? Just wanna make sure she's not gonna charge an armed tatortot to let her friends escape, heh. How would you rate your role-playing ability? I'd say a 7/10, but in reality its probably more of a 6.5/10. I have RPed for a while, but I make mistakes sometimes. Not perfect, by any means. You're a pretty good RPer, from the bit I've seen. I'd probably give you a 7.5-8. Notes: This is my first crack at making a Tajaran, so please, any feedback is appreciated! Remember to chase laser pointers and you'll be fine! Link to comment
FreshRefreshments Posted June 10, 2018 Author Share Posted June 10, 2018 Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question Why do you wish to play this specific race: Because Tajaran are interesting! They have a culture that is heavily impacted by revolutions and nobility, and they are separated into various ethnicities that are built for different things. However, after further delving into their lore, I got into the idea of creating a character working with it. The mroe in depth I get into a races lore, the more I want to put a character into action. Although it takes time to fully get into Tajaran lore and figure out a way to implement yourself, that just makes the pay off of (hopefully, anyway) creating a character that other people enjoy reacting with, and I enjoy playing. I'm not quite sure what you mean by it taking time to get into the lore, but I have no major complaints about the answer. I meant actually sitting down and reading the entirety of the lore page, rather than getting bits and bops from certain areas like I normally do. When Rhagrrhuzau Hadii was assassinated, once she understood the entirety of the context it meant, she was conflicted. The death of their leader was sad, but the effects it had were certainly helpful to the Tajara as a whole. Her inner conflict quickly found a side when the Adhomai Liberation Army was formed, and she yearned for the fighting to stop. She had considered herself very lucky that the fighting had stopped before she was born, and was very disappointed to hear that it had started up again. Although her parents felt a constant connection to her blood ties were important, so was the life of their daughter. They scraped together enough money for the next shuttle to Biesel, and after a very hesitant, and drawn out goodbye, she set out, being 17 at the time. She worked in Biesel, in Mendell City, specifically District 10, before getting a desire to get and seek out, a job at NanoTransen, out of admiration for how they have helped Adhomai in the past. So, there're a few issues with this paragraph here, in my opinion. For starters, why did she think Long-Name Hadii being assassinated could be helpful? What made her support the ALA? It seems odd that she would admire NT as well, given her support for the ALA. I feel like her backstory was made to skirt around the major Tajaran plot-point. The war starts, then she's gone. She didn't endure any of the stuff that make Taj unique, y'know? PS: What job is she gonna have? Sorry, that confusion was on me. I meant she found the assassination of NT helpful because the effect Hadii's brother coming into power had. She considered herself lucky to have missed the First Revolution, and she considered NT's involvement the biggest reason. She also DIDNT support the ALA, but rather disliked them for bringing back more fighting. And, fair enough. The writing actually leaves a bit of confusion on times and ages, but she was 15 when the fighting began, 17 when she left. Ill have her leave a bit later so she actually endures more fighting. PS: Cargo Tech/Quartermaster, sorry, realized I left that out too. What do you like about this character? I enjoy her personality. She cares more for the safety of everyone, and will sacrifice her own if it means making a larger number of people safe. She likes having a large group of people around, and enjoys entertaining and making others feel good. In terms of the selflessness, how far is she gonna take that? Just wanna make sure she's not gonna charge an armed tatortot to let her friends escape, heh. She wouldnt charge face first into combat against 5 people with guns if it meant saving a couple people. She would stay back on station and try to make sure everyone got to Evac, if possible. Its her goal that ALL of them make it out; Not just her friends, but her too. Link to comment
SatinsPristOTD Posted June 11, 2018 Share Posted June 11, 2018 +1 Fresh has shown fantastic roleplay since I first saw their character, Erin. They add flavor and fun to the round and know how to properly behave when it comes to rules. Solid player. Link to comment
Mofo1995 Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 I will be reviewing this tomorrow. Link to comment
furrycactus Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 I've done a great deal of RP with FreshRefreshments, and I can say with confidence his characters are always a joy to interact with, Erin especially. They're believable, and are all always great additions to the rounds he plays. As for the lore, he seems to have a decent grasp on the timeline of events. I would say it's slightly short, but that's just a personal thing that's unrelated to the actual requirements. In all, he has my +1, because I think he could play a Tajaran well. Link to comment
Mofo1995 Posted June 15, 2018 Share Posted June 15, 2018 When Mer'tala was 15 and Rhagrrhuzau Hadii was assassinated, once she understood the entirety of the context it meant, she was conflicted. The death of their leader was sad, but the effects it had were certainly helpful to the Tajara as a whole; Rhagrrhuzau's brother actually stood by the promise with NT. Her inner conflict quickly found a side when the Adhomai Liberation Army was formed, and she was frustrated that people had decided that civil war was the best way to fix this. You sweet summer child. The naivety of Mer'tala radiates from her character. Her well-meaning peaceful nature ironically doubles back on itself to thinking a regime that pinned an assassination on an entire race and codified anti-Zhan (her own race) legislation. I guess what I mean is, Zhan are described as uneducated and consequently not very quick on the uptake. So to make such an innocent Zhan character who is somehow duped into believing the anti-zhan racist government is good and also that it was honorable for it to go back to NT's highly exploitative trade deals is an unbelievable fresh breathe of air. It's novel, believable, and even made me rethink the propaganda which the PRA might distribute. All around, it really got my mind joggin on why some people might genuinely support the PRA by providing a fresh perspective of the situation. Application approved. Link to comment
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