hivefleetchicken

I don't even know why I'm putting this here. But I am. For you, Jakers.

SORRY FOR INVITING MYSELF, BUT... I recommend (bear with me here) Nightbringer, a warhammer 40k novel about the Ultramarines' 4th Company Captain Uriel Ventris first discovering the Necrons (giant spooky skeletor robots) and releasing their ultimate God, or C'tan, 'The Nightbringer', into the mortal plain. Basically Ultramarines are sent to control a planet that was nearly in rebellion, only to find that the politicians trying to take control of the planet were evil evil evil and trying to use their power to release something /sinister/, aka a giant immortal being that looks like the grim reaper that has killed off billions of sentient races before, and will continue to do so. ...Also there's lots of politics, swindling, murder, mystery, plot-twists, badass characters, characters so evil they're on par with the joker, suspense , and all this shit as the Captain slowly finds out just what's going on there... - just, holy fuck this book took me for such a wild ride in 4th period geometry a while back, I'd be goin' "Ohhhh shit! OH FUCK, NO!" during notes on accident. Srs. S'about 300 pages. Get it on Ebay.

Shoulda' let the spiders win. That spider had green eyes and was thus a nurse spider - if she had won, she would have wrapped up the bodies of the monkeys and other simple mobs and laid eggs inside of them. Each of those eggs then hatching around 7-10 more spiders. You wasted some reaaaal potential there, friend. Mad face.

Good luck, fuckers

Shayla Roberts - 55.

Literally. Fuck this thread.

Okay, so. I just took my CHSPE exam, or California High School Proficiency Exam, back in March. As it turns out, I don't have to be in highschool anymore. I got a 4.5 outta' 4.5 on the writing part, and something close to that in the other subject, which was math. I'll be going to a community college called College of Marin for my GED instead starting in the fall, but as for a High School Diploma, I now legally have no need for one now. I'm only taking base core classes (3rd, 4th, + 5th period, everything else I dropped out of) until the end of the year. Woot. I was wondering how your college experiences were/are/will be(?w?o?t?) and if you got any recommendations for Universities, all that. I intend to transfer after my first two years to a UC, maybe SF State, Berkeley, Stanford, all that. I've definitely got the smarts and the looks for it. So yeah. Discuss 'n' shit, I'd love to hear about your thingies and whatnots.

srsly tho lifelick texture ;-;

What to heck???? Coccoonses??? wHAT is this, insect gameply? lol

You need a bigger blender - Trust me, I'm a professional in that field. I've got a few recommendations that I could send you - they always get the job done.

I could recognize the stench of him anywhere. Even as the smoke of my cigarillo clotted the air, tugged at my lungs as I stared out the window, I could make out the smell of Major Cockblocker, Sgt. Catbeast Intothebrig from the second he walked into the door. I heard his voice catch in his throat as he struggled to speak through the haze of my lounge. Oh well, I reflected. "Hive. We need you back on the case," words thick with nutriment and justice. I'd heard them many times before, but never before with so much dread swathing their every syllable. "I'm done with that life," I begin, straining my eyes to gaze upon the buzzing streets below. "Not after the war. After they took everything from me. Even the twins." I can remember them now, sun-filled blue eyes and ruby cheeks, dancing on the hillside. Things were different, then. Simpler. But it all changed once the cat beasts came. The ERPers. The greytide could do nothing to halt them. So many good men. Good assistants. Janitors, cargo techs, chefs, all lost to the horde of furries and nurse insurgents. I lost everything in the blink of an eye. They took everything I cared about and loved, strived to protect, and *me-fucked it to oblivion. Even though I can't see him, I can sense him mewling for the right words, feet from me. "I-I-- We--, Hive, we, the city. We need you. You're the only one the men will listen to. You're all that's left. If you won't do it for me. Do it for--" "Shut your mouth," I cry out, spinning around in my chair and standing, the movement sapping every ounce of strength I have to keep myself upright, biting back the pain. The scars of my life's stories are carved beautifully around my features and I grimace at the thought, letting him see their true visage in the light of my desk lamp as I lean towards him. "Don't you dare talk about them. They had nothing to do with this, you bastard. They were just kids!" "I'll do it," I growl, unable to fight back my anger. "Not for you. Not for my family. Not for all that they've taken from us. But for what's right." My second-in-command nods quickly, swallowing his spittle to substitute closure. "For the Emprah," he would murmur. "For the Emprah," I gladly second, guiding my footsteps to the door and letting his light wash over me as I step outside into the dim city streets. "I'll make them pay," I snarl, adjusting my assistant's collar as I hide my banana peel further under my coat. "I'll make those fuckers pay."

ENFORCER IS SO DAMN COOL FUCKING SHREDDING THOSE FILTHY XENOS TO PIECES WITH MY CROWD CONTROL 'NADE LAUNCHERS. WOOO!

Who the fuck only has one slice of pizza. -1 points for poor representation of traitors. You never go one slice. Jesus. (I fucking love it)

I don't think this surprised anyone.

I take them off "Do the sex on me" I say And then Chaz is Christian Gray

THE AGE OF EDIT SPAMMING HAS BEGUN.

GET OUT JUST L-LIKE ALL THE OTHERS IT'S N-NOT LIKE I-I'LL MISS YOUR OR ANYTHING!~ (Holy fuck not you ;-

Why yes, he did! That'd be about the fifth time he's done that, too.

Alucard. Just. Alucard. He defriended me on steam after I killed him one round for beating me into near crit with a riot shield and screaming "FUCK YOUR SHIT".

The beta bitch on the horse would remain silent like the BETA BITCH she /is/, before turning and furrowing her brow at Bernhard. "I doubt it," she would mutter, before turning back to face ahead.

+1

HIVE THEN BREAKS THE FOURTH WALL AS HE STARES AT LEMON. "HELL MOTHERFUCKING YES I KNOW WHAT NINJAGAYING IS IM HIVE DAMN IT." "OOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAGH"

HIVE GETS JEALOUS OF CANON GETTING TO BE KHORNE AND QUITS THE THREAD *poof* HE THEN COMES BACK AS *GASP* HIMSELF, MID-FALL ONTO LEMON, AND BASHES THAT COWBOY'S SHITFUCKSTICKERINOHEAD WITH AN AXE, BEFORE LEAPING ON CANON AND POWERGAMING THE SHIT OUT OF CANON'S KHORNEFLAKE-BITCH-ASS-WGOIAIOGAOPIAOIA-DICK, GIVING HIS WHOLE PHALLUS A 5 FOOT CIRCUMCISION THAT EXTENDS OUT THE LENGTH OF HIS ASS AND OUT OF THE MATERIAL UNIVERSE WITH HIS HAMMER. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHBLOODFORTHEBLOODGODSKULLSFORTHESKULLTHRONELETTHEGALAXYBUUUUUUUUUUUURNHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hive turns and leaps on the two of them, first slashing at Lemon with the hammer for BEING A FUCKING USELESS POWERGAMER Hive screams "#TOTALLYGANKEDWITHOUTANYRP" as he crashes into the armored citrus fruit.