dessysalta

Putting out a long heartfelt paragraph doesn't do justice when it comes to what I think about Lent as a writer. A lot of his ideas are rooted in fundamentals but not such that they're oversaturated or overdone with nonsense we've seen a hundred times over. I think the proposed arcs above also demonstrate his ability to create and connect other parts of lore in a meaningful fashion. I'm a little biased because he told me my clan is cool, but I really can't think of a better addition to the lore team. Tl;dr Man, it sure would suck if you made the Drek'za and Tau'ha'nor clans canon. +1!

+1! I trust Pocheto to write a Unathi well on many fronts, especially after interacting with them one too many times on Aurora. And also because they said they'd make a Drek'za. The only thing I think you should expand upon is how religion plays a part in Unathi society/for Auk'razzi. It's a big part of who they are collectively. What does she believe in? How does it affect her?

HOKAY THE DOC'S DONE!! It's not the greatest thing in the world, but there's some changes on it. I'll document all I can remember changing or adding. Read here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/184r1YLUJipTCINXsqkG348Ct4_ZA0uSrn2dnisay3Fg/edit?usp=sharing (or click the doc in the main post). Notable changes (the ones I can remember at least): - I added an extended disclaimer at the start. - Fudged some numbers in the history section a little bit arbitrarily. Felt like starting earlier and finishing construction earlier makes sense. - Rewrote the Overview section to be a little more broad while also remaining concise. - Added some more in the Life On The Arthropod's Asteroid section, such as a general population count, ethnic make up, some intro notes on epithets, etc. - Rewrote part of the main Epithets section, added some bits and bobs. - Added a concept list at the bottom alongside my own thoughts for what could be done instead if this is chosen as a simple third-party faction rather than an outright antagonistic one. Now I can finally rest, Jesus. If any of you have thoughts or critiques to mention here (lore dep or otherwise), go ahead and reply below and I'll do my best to get back to you.

Honestly, I trust Casgam to play a Diona gestalt so long as they pay extra attention to how they act/etc., the only issue I need to point out is you barely have anything written about what makes them different, why you want to play them, etc. it's very barebones. Remember, it's a paragraph for each question at minimum, so you'd be better off doubling or tripling everything you've written so far. Remember not just to regurgitate wiki content or explanations; really, truly think about how a nymph or gestalt would act as opposed to someone like a human. +1, just remember what I said. Also, you better not have given up on your Vaurca app. 👀

Think I might do a revamp based off what I have currently. It's a good start, but it's missing things like more details about Greima (which still needs it's own lore app or written entry on the wiki) and some more cultural differences. Maybe even make it a two-parter, with different boxes or lines of text with different colors to indicate changes or details that are either beneficial (if the corp is selected just to be a loose congregation of freedom fighters) or negative (if the corp remains antagonistic). I like all of what I've made so far, but it feels like a somewhat loose addition on some fronts. It could do with expansions on things like general population and racial makeup, some core beliefs, maybe even throw in a uniform here and there. My partner agreed to draw a flag for Gorlex, so stay tuned for that. For the lore team: This application is acceptable on its own, and I'll keep what I have currently as it's own thing (and just make a gdoc for the expanded version) but look forward to another edit tonight, within the next few days at the latest. Sorry to keep changing it, its a little difficult to settle on any one idea and near impossible for me not to dream up different ideas after the fact lmao.

Yeah, I'll agree with this 100%.

I understand it's the norm to RP on the RP server (crazy, right?) but I feel like this is disingenuous as to how hostile events are received. It's our job as security, and by extent the rest of the crew, to ensure the ship does not go up in flames because of a hivebot/greimorian infestation/blob. Security during an extended round very quickly falls into a "let's all get piss drunk at the bar or smoke in the hallway" without conflict, and these events by definition lend greater depth to combat engagements or normal RP. Antagonists are one thing; random events that involve mindless drones or mobs spike a different kind of fear. It's all about the dynamic between being faced with a hostile killing machine (mercenary) and a hostile killing machine that you cannot negotiate with. These things are feared for a reason, don't doubt the amount of roleplay or creative conflict that can arise because of it. This being said, you could just as reasonably argue that it's like a joke we've heard a thousand times that really isn't that funny anymore. I don't personally feel that way since I still have ~a year of playtime, but I can definitely see where that comes from and I'm with you on that front. I like where this is going, but then I feel like this runs the risk of making too many things optional. A lot of people seem to forget they're on an expeditionary vessel to discover one of the rarest materials in the galaxy. It has to be plagued with threats small or big, along the way. If we relegated hivebots, or the blob, or any other large impact random event to different gamemodes, we would be missing the point of working on the SCCV Horizon. It's supposed to be at least some amount of dangerous; you have binding NDAs everywhere, especially for command staff, and there's been plenty of canon events where people really, forever die. The absolute worst case scenario for a ship in the event of a major infestation is you die and have to either respawn, pick a ghost role, or wait for next round. Plus, in terms of canonicity, character deaths are case-by-case and usually up to the owner of the character save for canon, major events. The only time I could see myself agreeing with this is during said events, because it would piss me off royally to die to a stray hivebot or grem when we're already, like, fighting the Lii'dra or something.

I would've given this a +1, but I'm giving it a -1 because it's so perfectly in-character for a megacorp to make you walk some fifty yards to get a cigarette instead of having it in the lounge area.

Added a "job titles and honorifics" section for funsies. I think it makes sense they'd be that pretentious, and it adds more to the culture of living on a population: 500 rock of death.

BYOND Key: Dessysalta Character Names: too fuckin' many!! (see image below) Species you are applying to play: Vaurca What color do you plan on making your first alien character: RGB 130, 150, 20 Have you read our lore section's page on this species?: Yup! Please provide well articulated answers to the following questions in a paragraph format. One paragraph minimum per question. Why do you wish to play this specific race: Short answer: I like the dichotomy between playing characters or races that belong to a community of complex social hierarchies, expectations, and personal wishes that have a place in all of that (like political decisions resulting in backstabs or alliances). Longer answer: Vaurca strike me as interesting because they're an inherently disconnected race compared to humans, Unathi, or really any other "natural" race with a defined social structure and free-thinking for everyone. I like how charming (or the complete opposite) some Vaurca can be, how some are quite literally designed through their DNA whether or not to be capable of complex social interaction, critical thinking, to have a preference between violence or pacifism, or even how they feel about certain subjects in the first place. Zohd and Dez are great examples of Vaurca, in my opinion, retaining their inherently disconnected nature while still putting a unique spin on them. I like how clueless or knowledgeable the bugs can be about things, like how Zohd assumed someone who says they fight evil has fought the Lii'dra, or how Dez acts like it knows everything there is to know about relationships and how to maintain a good friendship (and probably does, realistically) or how interesting and kind a giant 10-foot-tall Ta can be to the comparatively tiny meat bags humans are. I just like the diverse complexities that go into what would otherwise be a normal humanoid race. They simultaneously expand upon and completely redefine certain genres or schools of thought and thinking, with some Vaurca having hugely expanded definitions or concepts of certain things while others don't, or do but in some other field that the first one has no idea about. I also really want to make a bound because I think bound characters are both extremely interesting and hilarious after watching a drooling one bump into a wall ICly. Identify what makes role-playing this species different than role-playing a Human: The biggest disconnect between Vaurca and humans in my opinion lies in how they're made in the first place, with being specifically hatched or bred to serve a specific purpose, regardless of whether or not they're bound or unbound. A K'laxan Warrior in the Hegemony will almost always have an analytical eye in combat, a C'thur doctor will have an understanding of how to patch patients up, and above all else, almost complete subservience to the queen they were birthed to obey. I think it was Ta'Akaix'Nangeren that told my character ICly that "revolutions" aren't much of a thing if at all within Vaurca hives, owed to how queens (lesser and not) take to the creation of their brood and how incredibly unlikely it is for a Vaurca to be faced with such inane circumstances that it would choose to abandon its hive or queen entirely, considering they're indoctrinated and taught through pheromones and their very being not to do so (and they'd likely be culled before it was a problem). When it comes to being raised, doing so in virtual reality rather than the "real world" is interesting, partially because being free from mortal wounding or bodily needs is just a plus, and mostly because its quite literally a way to be known after death, to train a Vaurca all hyperbolic-time-chamber-like (with how their perception of time can be many magnitudes slower than real time), or to communicate ones life story in a matter of days. Each queen having their own realm within VR is super neat, too, with queens like Vedhra basing their realm wholly on weapon development and study of techniques (alongside medicine, tools, etc.) and appointing weavemakers to create specialized entertainment or training parts of the realm. Lastly, their biological and theological differences have a place, too. Most Vaurca beliefs are rooted in their respective queens, which means they're only more likely to continue serving them, and things like being a closed system able to go EVA with ease or rely on the otherwise-toxic phoron and k'ois compared to how every other species can't/doesn't makes them this sort of double-edged sword when it comes to performing a task, capable of feats most other species aren't but with the tradeoff of requiring an otherwise rare and/or lethal substance in order to continue existing. Being more accustomed to working in tunnels as their biology implies means they can suffer from migraines or headaches and dizziness from being around bright lights for long periods of time, and an enhanced olfactory sense means they can take in nuances of words or character just by smelling. Character Name: Za'Akaix'Tonz K'lax Please provide a short backstory for this character: An Unbound Warrior of Queen Vedhra's brood, Tonz was bred to be a soldier who understood the intricacies of combat, weaponsmithing, and comradery. Having spent a good deal of time in VR, Tonz was somewhat revered among his immediate colleagues for being a fast and precise marksman within the Incursion, or Retek wargame with one of the highest kills-to-deaths ratio regarding (simulated) Lii'dra scum. It would go on to employ its quick tactics within the Izweski Hegemony, firing off from the planet of Tret and aiding Kataphracts and their hopefuls in the war as old as time that is to quell rebellion and deal with pirates. Unfortunately, Tonz would be slain in battle following the raiding by a ship of Salak Kazhkz, having failed (or, more correctly, refused) to provide the Grudgebearer a feast. However, fortunately, Tonz's death would not last forever. The surviving Sinta of its ship dug out its neural socket for return, an ally he had respected now dead, and sent it back to Tret with full honors. Queen Vedhra, or perhaps one of her more trusted elites or unbounds, decided that the potential of Tonz was not to be wasted, and instead chose to resleeve the warrior, raising it in VR for what it perceived as years before finally being allowed to roam the galaxy again. Now, Tonz seeks to use its experience in battle to mentor others, to warn them of Lii'draic threats, and above all else, to ensure none of its colleagues fall in battle again, no matter the cost. It seeks to apply its knowledge in a new field: the Horizon and its quest for phoron. What do you like about this character? I love battle-hardened characters, bug or otherwise, and I like the idea of using Tonz not as another security character (well, not for a bit anyways) but instead as an assistant that takes it upon itself to post near doorways or departments and be a pseudo-security officer that will almost certainly be told off in place of real security--but that doesn't matter to it, only that it's the first line of defense against an attack of some kind. Being "reincarnated" after watching those around you die and making it your life goal to ensure that never happens again sounds so cool, and opens up the way for in-depth talks about life and death and mortality in general, and how Tonz perceives such a thing given its experiences. How would you rate your role-playing ability? Pretty decent. Good, maybe. 8/10? Notes: I'm going to make a bound immediately after this, probably LMAO. I asked the player of Nangeren if I could make a bound or unbound assistant whose purpose is to be their little buddy, but I dunno. Also curious to see what I can do as far as Lii'dra gimmicks go. Some questions I think the lore team might have are here:

Bumping this. Consulars and liaisons should absolutely be allowed to be missing limbs. Captains and such could probably get away with it ICly, but there's a bunch of things that aren't allowed OOCly regardless of what makes sense ICly.

I fucking LOVE the idea of this. Make it happen immediately. +1

Yeah, but Moghes/Unathi and I'm 90% sure skrell and IPCs are baystation lore despite being so heavily modified in aurora that they're not the same thing. This gives a face to a name, and I prefer the "improve, don't remove" way of doing things. Plus, the Gorlex Marauders are just a bloodthirsty militia in TG lore with no actual standing aside from "we kill things and make money". They're as average as pirate/terrorist factions get, and I feel like what I'm proposing is its own thing (though that's not really a high bar given how little TG has written about lore).

I also think it's plausible that the Marauders could be turned into a simple non-SCC faction outlawed simply because they're not SCC (LMAO) or not outlawed in the first place, and just frowned upon. If this doesn't see inclusion as an antagonist corporation, it could be neat to see as a non-SCC one. Edit: Oh! It'd also be a nice thing to rely on in lieu of Einstein Engines.

Lore Impact (Small/Medium/Large): Medium Species: Unathi (with some light general themes) Short Description: So, I noticed the crimson voidsuits/hardsuits you can find or buy with traitor gear have the "Gorlex Marauders" tag still on them when you examine them. There's no wiki entry, so why not? Here's a traitor corporation pirate faction in case you want to make traitors that get laid (/j), it focuses on illegal armor and weapons manufacturing. How will this be reflected on-station?: More pirate/illegal arms factions are always good. Opens up the path for more traitor gimmicks, mercenary or raider visits, or word-through-the-grapevine chats and conversations about their existence and what they could do next. Maybe even off-ship roles or ruins, like a weapon development site nestled in an asteroid or on the run from Rangers and other spacefaring authority, or arcs and canon events down the line. Does this addition do anything not achieved by what already exists?: There's plenty of other pirate factions, I'll be real with you, but although there's other groups people can pick from this adds some extra depth to a design of armor that previously had no entry or reference on the wiki. Plus, I dunno what criminal/black market arms manufacturers there are, if any. Do you understand that the project may change over time in ways you may not foresee once it is handed over to the Lore Team? Yup! As with my last app, I completely understand anything I write here could be fully implemented, not at all, heavily modified or only slightly. Aurora's cool, I know the lore team will make it work. Long Description: So, before I begin, let's go over some broad strokes: Without further ado, here's the pitch. This is the pirate faction variant, designed to be put onto the Unathi Piracy wiki after some discussion with Villa and word from Triogenix. This said, I'll leave the document below in case the lore team reconsiders. Gorlex Honorifics, ideas for the names of titles, etc. Edit: If the lore team wants to further include the part of their culture that deals with nicknames and job titles, you can copy-paste most of below and preface it with "Further examples of nicknames and epithets can be found here:" and create a drop-down box. Below is a document for the previous version of the Marauders, intended to be used as a full antagonist faction rather than just a pirate one. This is outdated, but can be used in the future if the lore team reconsiders. https://docs.google.com/document/d/184r1YLUJipTCINXsqkG348Ct4_ZA0uSrn2dnisay3Fg/edit?usp=sharing And finally, logos! In case you didn't see them in my comment below, here's a spoiler with them inside:

I don't know how I feel about Gilt in command, but a trial would much better help me to understand how they act with authority. You tend to rush into battle when that's not something you can do as a command member most of the time, but I think it's possible for all my worries to be overshadowed by having an understanding of what the command position is (which is how I learned to stop rushing myself). +1 for a trial. Gotta see that first before I give detailed opinions.

I feel like you should go a little more in depth when it comes to talking about the differences between humans and IPCs. You speak very vaguely--what specifically do they think about more than a human might? How do they view self-preservation? What about goals or directives? How does a positronic learn? This being said, I'm gonna give a +1 because I know you're capable of writing an IPC proficiently, especially after writing Tau for so long.

Same here, I dunno if I can see it after checking my clubs/subforums.

+1. My own two cents: Aboard a multi-million credit space ship that prides itself as being the flagship of the Chainlink, with security officers that are armed with ballistics, high-power laser weapons, and even an anti-materiel cannon alongside armor heavy enough to tank 8 shotgun slugs without so much as leaving a dent in you (this happened to me once), it feels unreasonable to say that those specifically employed on the ship, specifically military contractors among other things, are not allowed to execute someone unless they're a recurrent threat. If I was playing as a Tajara and a team of Front soldiers showed up, you can't expect me to provide "reasonable escalation" even if the Front people are roleplaying as though they're slightly less fanatical than the rest of their once-powerful fleet. Certain groups are and always will be so overly distasteful to the greater Horizon crew that executing them is only reasonable (if my character is an ex-Sol vet who fights for Biesel and encounters someone like a Leaguer or Frontist, they are going to blow their heads clean off 99 times out of 100). Generally speaking, I think the proposed rules do a better job than any escalation policy had done before at determining what is or isn't a valid execution, but I still do think there's room for improvement. Paraphrasing what Fluffy said, there's going to be so many nuanced cases and circumstances between one player and another (or far more than that) that giving concrete "you must do this all the time" rules will only stifle creativity. That said, this change would introduce a much better "flow" into executions rather than barring them near-entirely, my only concern is how adrenaline or high-intensity situations will be affected and interpreted. Take these for example: A lone civilian with a gun they found being shot four times, nearly dying, and then standing up and emptying their entire magazine into the opponent, killing them A PMC that just took ten rounds to the chest, fell down, got up, then was overwhelmed by the presence of the rest of their squad turning up and barely offering aid, and in turn killed the perpetrator, who is part of a well-known terrorist group, for bruising and breaking their ribs A crew member with a bounty on their head is confronted by a group of bounty hunters and is forced to make the split-second decision to either execute the antagonists to prevent word of whatever horrible thing they did that lent them their bounty getting out All of these are reasonable scenarios (the second one could be a little dodgy) in which an antagonist is executed. A civilian has no reason to stop firing considering they don't have years of experience in these kinds of situations, a contractor part of a militia or private military will be more prone to violence considering their regimen, someone with a bounty on their head isn't going to go quietly and is moreover going to seek to prevent any and all further conflict that arises, be that because of bounty hunters or corporate security. Hard OOC limits like escalation has the potential to be will more often than not stifle creativity, when the correct way to encourage it is to make it limited in some regard (like what is currently being proposed/what Fluffy said). This last paragraph in the spoiler is strictly my own thoughts and I think they should have no concrete place in escalation policy; these points I feel should only be considered when writing escalation or execution policy in the future, and shouldn't be taken as law (because that defeats the purpose of it). TL;DR I think the execution policy should include a bold disclaimer to the effect of "exceptions to this rule are fine and encouraged so long as you do not needlessly kill and ensure each decision is made with thought-provoking narratives or creativity in mind." Maybe even make it a "don't quote this at admins or you'll be laughed at" part of the policy depending on how hard you want to lean into it--I personally think that might be a bit much.

Reporting Personnel: Vasquez, Kira Eladio Job Title of Reporting Personnel: Warden Game ID: cpj-dbas Personnel Involved: Kira Vasquez - Warden (Reporter) Castor Jensen - Investigator (Offender) Paige Murphy - Off-duty (Witness) Secondary Witnesses: Elwood Johnson - Officer (Witness) CL-04401 - Officer (Witness) Frank Pewter - Officer (Witness) Logan Wright - Head of Security (Witness) Time of Incident: Roughly 20:30-20:45 ship time, 15/08/2465 Real Time: 15/08/23 Location of Incident: Security (Brig), Kitchen, Radio Communications [Security] Nature of Incident: [ ] - Workplace Hazard [ ] - Accident/Injury [ ] - Destruction of Property [ ] - Neglect of Duty [x] - Harassment [ ] - Assault [x] - Misconduct [x] - Other - Failure to Execute an Order (I asked the Commander to give a 'no politics and racism' order over communications, he obliged, Castor did not obey.) Overview of the Incident: Security department ended up having a chat about usage of the word "cat" to describe Tajara. I and the Tajara Ana Roh'hi'tin were vehemently against usage of the slur to describe a Tajaran individual. Elwood made a few off-hand comments about it, but agreed with me. This is where Castor, and to some extent Frank, comes in. Castor asks if using the word "cat" is acceptable, to which all of us immediately say no. Later asks if using the phrase "cool cat" is acceptable, as it is "endearing". I explain that while it is endearing, it still makes use of a slur and is more than likely offensive. He replies with "endearing and offensive...I like that" before walking off. Later asks if using the words "domesticated" and "house" are offensive; I could not be properly sure if Castor was referring to cat.exe, our personal AI, or if he was once again being racist to Tajaran staff. However, when I replied, "if you're talking about Tajara? Yeah." He replied, "Uh huh. When was this decided?" At this point I had asked everyone to stop discussing it at least once, and to some people like Elwood, twice or thrice. I told Castor specifically to not use the word "cat" at least once, in varying degrees of politeness. The final straw was "Call me drunk, silly, stupid - but I am not racist against catpeople!" over security communications. I reached out to investigations and had them pull our radio logs from telecomms after the fact, and I provided a recording below. It was at this moment that I lashed out and couldn't stand for it, as the several times I had asked them to stop, and moreover asked Logan Wright, our Commander to drown it out, the remarks did not cease. In my rage, I struck and grappled Castor as a last-ditch effort to communicate to him what he was saying was, indeed, offensive. This was a major mistake on my part that I believe was made in good faith due to him being on our work force; I was reprimanded by our captain that shift, Joliba Kasongo, who filed an injunction stating to keep a no-contact-outside-of-work relationship with Castor until this was resolved. Paige and others (Elwood/Frank/Codus/Azradov) were there to see Castor continue to goad me into a fight after the fact, mocking me and saying things like "if I didn't have HR on my ass, I'd beat you", and words to that effect. It was at this point that I disengaged and made the motion to file an incident report with the help of Alsina Tau'ha'nor, Executive Officer. Submitted Evidence: As mentioned, here is the comms chatter from our security radios. I also included the Commander's initial response to me over PDA when I asked him to take care of it. I'm sure if there's anything else relevant, you can ask investigations to parse more of our radio logs and whatever happened to be near a security camera, if they haven't been wiped yet. Would you like to be personally interviewed?: [x] - Yes [ ] - No Did you report it to a Head of Staff or a superior? If so, who? If not, why?: Yes, Alsina Tau'ha'nor, to elevate it via an IR, and Logan Wright, to snuff it out in the first place. Actions taken: Commander made a remark over communications (detailed above) per my request to snuff out the usage of Tajaran racial slurs. Executive Officer and Captain Joliba Kasongo spoke with some of the affected parties. Additional Notes: I take full responsibility for the minor assault and accept in hindsight I made a lapse in judgement. Despite this, I know for a fact that I uphold my duty as both an officer and a warden, and although I am not a perfect human being (I would even go so far as to say striking someone for making a racist comment is only natural), I can always try. I value my peers and the rest of the crew on-ship as though they are another family, as I wouldn't be an officer if I made no effort to advise and police them--but I should not have taken such a rash and direct path to handle this.

WOO boy, we're getting close to a month since last update. Crazy. I won't spoil anything major, just know that a lot of it's going to be confusing war-induced psychosis, because that's pretty much all I have the mind to write for this particular situation LMAO. I've been running over concepts in my head but haven't done a whole lot of writing atm; been focusing on my mental health and other projects, like art commissions and such. As far as feedback goes, assuming any of you want to gimme that, I made a thread for my characters that also doubles as a feedback page for Battlecry. If any of you have ideas on where to take the story (or my characters) (or just have feedback in general) and want to post them without clogging this thread, that's the place to do it. It's nice to see at least a few people like what I'm writing. First time I've actually undertaken a project like this, so we'll see where it goes. Maybe I'll get some kind of award from the Aurora team, lmao.